


Town of Sanses (that's just the current title, it's subject to change)

by Maxils



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Everyone Is Gay, Fresh Is Emotionless, Lust is Lust, M/M, Swearing, and I mean everyone, au au bullshit, black is angst boi, blue is good christian pureboi, cross hates social interaction because chara, dream is DREAMing of being with cross (im not sorry), edge is hella anti-religion, error is haphephobic computer nerrrrrrrrrrrrrrd, even pureboi christian blue who should not be gay cuz christian, fresh speaks the language of the gods (the cringe gods that is), geno is good boi who hates error, horror is horror, i have not much understanding on religion, i know what i do because of dawson's creek and young sheldon, i will add more., illusion the oc is both pure and the polar opposite of pure, ink is soulless dun dun dun, ink is weird and socially awkward because soulless, many shipping, mature tag added early, might add more chars as time goes on, much swearing, much tag, nightmare is a dick to everyone, no ecto-ANYTHING, no ecto-dicks, no ecto-tongues, no flowey either, no sex tho, not even lust has sex, possibly, reaper is necrogenophilic, sans is depresso espresso, sci is pretty much only there for plot purposes, so!, that i have swearing in like all my works, thinking about major char death, very word, yeet, you should know if you read my other stuff, you're prolly gettin bored now cuz of all of these tags
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-08
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:01:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 21,982
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21724927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maxils/pseuds/Maxils
Summary: Edge wants religion dead. He couldn't give fewer damns, and nobody is ever gonna get him into a church... until someone comes along and steals his heart.Error is a technological genius who feels underappreciated, though that changes once he meets a talented young artist hiding a dark secret.Geno is trying to escape from the memories of his past. To do this, he seeks the help of a death-obsessed graveyard manager.Dream is a therapist who has exactly two clients: a depressed pun lord and a very odd but very hot writer.Lust is a stripper at the local club. He has one particular favorite person, and that is the local butcher.I am someone who will probably degrade all of this into nonsense.Also this whole story sucks and is fucking stupid and I might rewrite it if I ever get the motivation.
Relationships: AfterDeath - Relationship, CherryBerry, Cream - Relationship, Errink, HorrorLust
Comments: 73
Kudos: 51





	1. in which Error receives two annoying phone calls, Ink runs out of paint, Classic is a dick to Edge and Blue is a good Christian

**Author's Note:**

> The Sanses in this series, their jobs and why I gave them those jobs:  
> Ink = Artist (duh)  
> Blue = Good Christian Pureboi (pureboi)  
> Edge = Fast Food (because reasons)  
> Classic = Fast Food (because reasons)  
> Sci = Scientist (duh) and Doctor (because the skeles need an actual doctor)  
> Dream = Therapist (idek y)  
> Lust = Stripper (yes, a stripper. the reason is obvious.)  
> Error = Computer Nerd (because error)  
> Geno = Volunteer Worker (because my mind decided this) and Cashier (because my brain decided that Geno needs money)  
> Cross = Writer (because idk)  
> Black = Police (because uhhhhhhhh)  
> Horror = Butcher (because axe)  
> Reaper = Night Manager at Graveyard (because death)  
> Fresh = Memer. Yes. Fresh's job is memes. (because fresh)
> 
> Some aspects of this are inspired by other Undertale AU fanfics. This includes exactly zero of the jobs. I am adding the Mature rating early because of a certain stripper.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In other news, Geno and Ink run into each other, Edge stays up until three in the morning, and Blue almost dies because he's Christian.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sci, Lust, Cross, Black, Horror, Reaper and Fresh will exist soon. For Fresh, very soon...

**{Error’s POV}**

“This is Error, what do ya want?” Error asked with the phone by his ‘ear.’  
“Hey, my laptop won’t turn on. Can you help?” the other end spoke.  
Error was used to these sort of calls. He was the biggest (and quite possibly only) computer nerd in town.  
“When was the last time you plugged it in?”  
“Laptops can be plugged in?” the voice answered.  
Error sighed. _What a moron._ Putting on his best understanding voice, he informed the caller, “There’s the problem. The battery must be dead.”  
“Oh, no! How do I revive it?”  
_Are you fucking serious?_ Error groaned. He really hoped that this was a prank call and that this person didn’t actually not know how laptops worked.  
“Do you have a cord that came with your laptop?”  
“Yeah.”  
“Okay, plug in the small end into the laptop and the big end into a wall, then wait a few minutes.”  
The caller was silent for about thirty seconds before answering, “Okay, done.”  
_Finally._ “Do that regularly, and your laptop’s batteries should die a lot less.”  
“Thanks. Bye!” The caller hung up, filling Error with a sense of relief. Finally, that damn call was over.  
The phone rang again and Error had to focus all of his willpower on not throwing it against the wall, and picking it up instead.  
“What is it?”  
“Is your refrigerator running?”  
_Oh._ “Well uh, I think. Yeah.”  
“Then you’d better catch it!” the other end laughed. Error slammed the phone down, but it didn’t shatter, somehow.  
“I think I’m done with calls for today,” Error stated to himself as he got back to work on the program he had been writing.

**{Ink’s POV}**

Ink prepared to paint. He had his paper, paintbrush and newspaper set out. All that was left to find was the actual paint.  
“Where is that stupid paint?” he asked himself as he searched through each drawer on his desk. This was the only plaice he did any art, so this must have been where his paints were… Unless he moved them… But he never moved his paints, except to paint, so that wasn’t a valid explanation…  
When he finally got to the last drawer, it was empty, save for a single piece of paper. Ink picked it up to see if there was anything on it.  
It read: _Buy more paint. You’ve been out since yesterday._  
“Oh.” So, that’s where his paint had gone.  
Ink got out of his chair without putting his art supplies away. He was probably going to get back to painting later.  
As Ink left, he shut off all of the lights in his apartment, something he made sure that he reminded himself to do each time he left.  
As he turned around from closing his door, though, he bumped into someone and fell to the ground.  
“Hey! Watch where the heck you’re going!” a deeper voice spoke. Standing above Ink was a skeleton wearing a blue hoodie and red scarf. Across his white t-shirt was a red streak that looked almost like blood. The skeleton himself had one of his eyesockets glitching, which was off-putting. For some reason, though, he looked oddly familiar, like Ink had seen him somewhere…  
The skeleton stepped over Ink after a minute, and Ink brushed himself off. “Rude.” He proceeded to go towards the exit of the apartment when he realized that he had left his keys inside of his apartment.

**{Classic’s POV}**

Sans snickered at the reaction of whoever the hell he’d called as Edge walked into the door, black and yellow hoodie and all.  
“Yo, Edge,” Sans winked. Edge just glared at Sans exhaustedly. “Jeez, you look _bone-tired._ Didja have a _bone to pick_ with some religious bastard?” Edge got into fights with the religious on a near-daily basis. It was a well-known fact. It was also well-known that those fights mentally drained Edge, and sometimes physically, too.  
Edge let out a loud snort at the puns. “Nah, jus’ didn’t get to sleep till… ‘bout three. In the mornin’.”  
“Damn, I hate that,” Sans muttered under his breath. The last time he hadn’t slept until three in the morning, he was miserable - possibly more miserable than Edge was right now - for the entire day, and the day after that.  
“Eh, nothin’ you can do about it.” Edge sat down at one of the tables and rested his head.  
“We still have a few minutes until we open, you know,” Sans pointed out. “You can nap for while, but… in the kitchen, okay?”  
“Mmmkay,” Edge nodded, teleporting into what was probably the kitchen, judging by the clatter of pots and pans. “OW, SHIT!”  
Now, it was Sans’ turn to laugh. “That’s what happens when you teleport while half-asleep, dumbass!” he snickered.  
“ASSHOLE!”  
Sans went into the kitchen to check on Edge.

~timeskip brought to you by inspiration from another fanfic and half-asleep teleportation~

After confirming that Edge had no injuries, it was time to open up shop. Immediately, that one weirdo from that one church entered, along with the therapist Sans had been seeing for his depression.  
“Dream! How’s it shaking?” Sans greeted the therapist.  
“Oh, hello, Sans,” Dream greeted him. “It’s going well. I’d like you to meet my friend, Blue.”  
“Dream, why are we here?” Blue inquired, looking disgusted. “Oh. Yes. I’m Blue.”  
“Heya, Blue. The name’s Sans. _Tibia_ honest, you don’t strike me as the kind of guy who likes fast food.”  
Blue’s eyesockets widened furiously.  
“Guess ya don’t like puns, either.”  
“This place is full of sin. Why did you bring me here, Dream?” Blue asked. Sans could have sworn that he heard an “and puns” immediately after.  
“OH, HELL NO!” Edge shouted from the kitchen.  
Sans turned his head instinctively as a pot crashed. “What’s going on in there?” he called.  
Edge held a pan in his hand as he exited the kitchen. “Why the hell is there a religious bastard in here?”  
“Hey!” Blue yelled, clearly insulted by the remark. This was not going to end well.  
Just as Sans thought that a fight was about to start up, Edge went back into the kitchen.  
“What in God’s good name is wrong with him?” Blue questioned.  
Sans took a moment to figure out whether Blue meant him or Edge, so he answered for both. “I’m depressed. He’s the living embodiment of atheism. Dunno what caused him to stop before he bashed your skull in, though.”  
“Wait, what?”  
“Nothin’...”  
“Anyways,” Dream interrupted, “can I get a…” He paused to glance at Blue. “ _Medium_ fries and a _classic_ hot dog? Large Coke, too.”  
Sans snickered to himself. Chances are, Blue didn’t know that Sans’ nickname was Classic. “Sure. Blue, ya want something?”  
“What’s the least unhealthy thing here, Dream?”  
Dream shrugged unknowingly, so Sans answered, “Probably salad and water.”  
“Then, I’ll have a salad and a drink of water, please.”  
“Got it.” Sans teleported into the kitchen to inform Edge of the order… and to ask why he didn’t attack Blue.  
“Hey, we got an order for medium fries, large coke, classic hot dog, salad and water.”  
Edge nodded in acknowledgement from the other side of the room.  
“Also, why didn’t you attack Blue?”  
“Cuz I didn’t wanna get fired or lawsuited, duh.”  
Sans glared at Edge, considering activating his glowing eye. “We both know that you don’t give a fuck about either of those.”  
“Fine! He’s too damn adorable to smash!” Edge’s face blushed deep red, like a cherry.  
“For someone who claims to be an _edge_ lord, you sure do have a soft spot for cute things.”  
“SHUT UP BEFORE I KILL YOU!”  
Sans shut up, knowing that Edge’s threats were normally real, and got to work on the hot dog.

**{Blue’s POV}**

_Did Sans say that the other guy might have bashed my skull in?_ Blue wondered. Despite that fact, Blue thought that the guy was kind of possibly slightly maybe c- _Stop!_ his mind screamed. Blue refrained from thinking any potentially lustful thoughts. He was a good Christian pureboi, and if the people on the Minecraft server found out that he had thought a sinful thought, they would hate him for it, and he’d be damned to Hell for all eternity, and-  
“Blue, are you alright?’ Dream asked.  
“Oh, me? Yes, I’m fine,” Blue confirmed. “No need to worry about me.” He refrained from mentioning his almost-lustful thought about the skeleton that had almost attacked him.  
“Large fries, classic ‘dog, coke, salad and water!” Sans called from the counter.  
“I’ll get the food,” Blue offered, getting out of the chair. He walked over to the counter to get their meals. “Thank you, but I have just one question.”  
“Ask ahead.”  
“What’s your fellow employee’s name?”  
“Oh, him? That’s just Edge.”  
_Edge, huh?_ “Alright. Thank you.”  
“No prob.”  
Blue returned to the table with the food. As he took a bite of the salad, his face reflexively scrunched up.  
It.  
Tasted.  
Horrible.  
“You eat here regularly?!” he exclaimed, filled with horror.  
“Yeah,” Dream nodded. “Sans’ hot dogs are the best.” His friend took another bite out of the hot dog. “Want some, Blue?”  
Blue just sighed at the gluttony he was seeing. “No, thank you. I should probably be getting to the church right about now.” He got up out of his seat. “Thank you for bringing me here, and I’m sorry to leave on such short notice. Goodbye.” He left the filthy grease trap and his nonexistent lungs were relieved to meet fresh air again. _Really_ fresh air…  
“Yo, what’s up, my radical bromigo?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This looked a lot longer on Google Docs...
> 
> Hey guys it's Maxils! Sorry I haven't updated my other shit yet.  
> Willow: You have, like, three pages of Warriors Canon Name Game to put up.  
> Shut up, Cat. That's Warriors. This is Undertale AUs.  
> ANYWAYS! Yeah, I write shit on Google Docs because it automatically saves my shit. Might make more of this, if it gets... oh, let's say... one Kudos?  
> Maxi: You'll probably write more anyways.  
> yeah prolly.  
> BUT STILL!  
> I do have other AU bullshit that I'm writing, hence the AU AU bullshit tag. The other AU bullshit that I'm doing is just AU bullshit.  
> Willow: Your point is?  
> damn im hungry for an ice cream sandwich  
> Willow: Why the hell do you do this.  
> Why the hell do you exist?  
> Maxi: You know we're not actually speaking to you, right? We're just your dog and cat.  
> SHUT UP! YOU DON'T LOVE ME, ANYWAYS!  
> Willow: *sigh* Maxils, just get to your point.  
> Anyways, I'm making this an actual project that I'm not gonna scrap after two chapters... or one. It will have good grammar, lots of bullshit and a SHIPload of shipping.  
> Maxi and Willow: *leave*  
> nuuuuuuuu come backkkkkkk
> 
> Next chapter, a dank memer will make everyone's life difficult! A computer nerd meets his soulmate! A writer has a therapy session! A hardcore atheist burns his hand because he loves a good Christian pureboi! Waitaminnit.
> 
> DRAMA ACTION POSSIBLE BLOODSHED!!!


	2. in which Fresh speaks the language of the cringe gods, Error goes shopping, Cross accidentally almost kisses Dream (possibly not accidental) and Edge almost burns his right hand off

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In other news, it's Sunday, Ink is a klutz, and Edge is the only one in this damn town who likes mustard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Geno will get more time in the spotlight next chapter.

**{Fresh’s POV (author's note as of line 1: god help me i’ve written the first line and i already know that this is going to be cringy af)}**

“Yo, what’s up, my radical bromigo?” Fresh greeted Blue.   
“Fresh, please, not now…” Blue facepalmed. It was this kind of reaction that Fresh knew would give him a good time.   
“How’s my brotastic homie shakin’?” Fresh continued.   
“It’s Sunday. I have to be at the church,” Blue answered. “Goodbye, Fresh.” Blue practically yeeted himself outta the situation. Fresh considered that a success.   
Out of the corner of his eyesocket, he could have sworn he saw Geno.   
Fresh shook away the feeling and continued onward to annoy more people, starting with that one guy carrying a huge paintbrush…  
“Yo, brah, what’s up?” he greeted the stranger. Geno had told him not to talk to strangers, but he ignored it because it was fun.   
“Oh. Hi.” This mysterious new person’s expression was very stoic, Fresh noticed.   
“So, what’s a radical dude like you doin’ out here on this radtacular day?”   
“Buying paints.”   
“So, you’re an artist, huh?” Fresh asked. Art was cool… sometimes.   
“Yeah. I just can’t remember to buy extra paint for the life of me.” Wow. Even this dude’s  _ voice _ was stoic.   
“Rad. My name’s Fresh.”   
“Cool. I’m Ink.”   
Wow. Ink. Who the funk would name their kid ‘Ink’? Probably an artist. Then again, Fresh’s name was Fresh.   
Fresh suddenly thought up a random question that he kinda really wanted to ask this person.   
“Hey,” he began, “do ya know a dude by the name o’ Geno?”   
Ink shook his head. “Might have met him, but I don’t know anyone with that name. Can you give me a description?” Ink was proving to be quite fun to talk to. He reminded Fresh of himself, for some reason.   
“Glitchy eye, blue jacket, red scarf, bloodstained shirt…”   
“Wait. That really  _ was _ blood?” Ink asked. “Yeah, I bumped into him earlier… literally. I was leaving my apartment just as he happened to walk by.”   
_ Now _ they were getting somewhere. “Thanks, brah. I’ll leave ya to buy your paints.”   
“You’re welcome.”   
“Later, radtastic homie.” Fresh walked in the opposite direction from Ink to find more people to talk to.  _ This’ll be fun, especially if I can get the location of that apartment. _

**{Error’s POV}**

Error walked up and down the aisles of the local convenience store, searching for anything good to eat. Normally, he didn’t do shopping in public places, because of his haphephobia, but his fridge was almost empty and he needed more food.   
As he walked past the computer aisle, he considered checking out computer parts, just in case his computer broke.   
_ Eh, might as well walk down  _ all _ of the aisles and get some exercise. _   
He walked up and down each aisle, stopping occasionally in the computer aisle.   
As he walked up the art aisle, he didn’t even see the other person coming.  
All Error could initially make out from the situation was that someone bumped into him, they had a giant paintbrush and they seemed to have not noticed him, either. Error freaked out from the prospect of someone touching him, even by accident, and was damn near sure that he’d go into a reboot.   
As his vision cleared from the initial shock, he heard the person who bumped into him apologize.   
“Sorry. Are you okay?” They were kind of tall looking, with a scarf on, and a sash with seven empty containers. Their eyelights were two differently-collored different shapes, and they were holding their hand out for him.   
“Y-yeah,” Error responded. “I’m… I’m fine.” Hesitantly, his hand reached out for the other skeleton’s. When the hands met, Error was pulled up. He could now see that this was a male skeleton.   
“God, this is the second time I’ve done this today. I’m such a klutz…”   
“N-n-no, it’s my fault. I-I should h-have been more caref-ful.”  _ Why the hell am I stuttering so much? _   
“My name’s Ink. What’s yours?”   
“M-me?” Error was startled by the question. Normally, people avoided speaking to him entirely. This ‘Ink’ person had managed to stay for more than one sentence, though. He suddenly remembered that he had been asked his name. “Oh, I’m E-Error.”   
‘Well, it was nice to meet you, Error. Again, sorry.”   
“It’s… fine.”   
Error got back to walking up and down each aisle walking up and down each aisle, but his thoughts remained filled with that “Ink” guy.

**{Cross’s POV}**

Cross waited patiently for Dream to arrive. This wasn’t the first time Dream had been late for one of their therapy sessions, and Cross was sure that it wouldn’t be the last.  
**_Well, duh,_** Cross’s ‘friend,’ Chara, thought.  
_Shut up, Chara._  
**_You know, you should date Dream._**  
Cross attempted to completely shut out the human that his soul was fused with. Him and Dream? That would never work! It would also probably never happen, not even for a moment. _Give yourself a fuck, Chara._  
“Sorry I’m late!” Dream burst through the door, panting heavily.  
**_Skeletons don’t have lungs, though._**  
“Hey, Dream. I’m ready for my therapy session.”  
Dream sat himself down in a chair. “Okay, good. Now, let’s begin.”

~timeskip brought to you by skeletons not having lungs and a little misfortune reference~

“So, tell me, have you vocally interacted with anyone other than myself in the past two weeks?”   
Cross couldn’t remember if he had or not.   
**_No, unless you count me and that one cashier at the local convenience store._ **   
_ Thanks for reminding me. _   
“Yeah. The one guy who works at the convenience store. You know, the one that volunteers around town when he’s  _ not _ doing his job,” Cross confirmed.   
**_HEY!!!_ ** _  
_ _ You don’t want Dream knowing about you, do you? _ _  
_ **_No…_ ** _  
_ _ Now, shut the fuck up. You’re the reason I hardly talk with anyone. _ _  
_ “Oh, that guy? That’s good,” Dream congratulated Cross. It made Cross happy, knowing that Dream actually gave a damn about his achievements.  _ At least  _ someone _ does.  
_ **_Not me, that’s for sure. Oh, look how close you and Dream are._ **   
Cross realized that he was sitting pretty close to Dream… If he just leaned in a little bit… maybe, six inches or so...   
“Cross?”   
“WHAT NO I WASN’T THINKING ABOUT KISSING YOU!” Cross snapped himself back into an upright position.   
**_Wow, great job, Romeo.  
_ ** “Wait, what?”   
“NOTHING!” Cross tried to stop himself from blushing like an idiot. He was probably failing miserably.   
**_You are, but you have your scarf over your face, so he probably can’t see it._ ** _  
_ _ Thank god.  
_ The rest of the therapy session went smoothly. Dream told Cross to try to talk to more people, and Chara wasn’t an asshole again until after they left.   
**_Damn, you almost got a date with the dude._ **   
“Shut up,” he growled. After looking around to make sure nobody heard, he left the area without a sound.

**{Edge’s POV}**

Edge began working on a burger for the most recent person to come in, that one volunteer guy that everyone knew existed but nobody knew the name of. Of course, the guy had asked for extra ketchup.  _ Why am I the only person in this damn town who likes mustard? _ Classic? Loved ketchup. Horror? Loved… who the hell knew what was in that bottle he carried around.   
_ Maybe the cute religious bastard likes mustard… What was his name again? _   
“Yo, Class, what wazzat religious bastard’s name?” he called to Classic.   
“Oh, you mean Blue?” Classic answered.   
“Yeah, that was the little shit’s name, I think.”   
“Yeah, I ship you two.”   
“FUCK OFF, ASSHOLE!” Edge hissed furiously. How  _ dare _ Classic ship him and that… that… that damn pureboi!   
That damn adorable pureboi of a Christian.   
He was starting to hate himself for even thinking that Blue was cute. Then again, Edge hated himself regardless.  
_ Fuck everyone and everything…  
_ “So, you still thinking about Blue?” Classic called.  
He gave Classic the finger and continued to flip the patty while thinking about Blue, but flipped too hard and at too big of an angle on one flip. He attempted to catch the patty with the spatula, and succeeded… placing his right hand on the grill in the process and not noticing for about ten seconds.  
Needless to say, the scream Edge let out upon that realization was unholy as fuck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Willow: Oh, hey, you got shit done!  
> Yeah, I did!  
> Bob: Why am I here?  
> Maxi: You're Maxils' hands twisted into each other to create a shitty snake-like thing.  
> Bob: :(  
> Bob is here to do Bob thingies. Examples include talking to me, being nice and actually giving a shit.  
> Willow: All of those mean the same thing.  
> Shut up, Cat. You were wrong about the Warriors thing, by the way. I was only short two pages.  
> Maxi: DAAAAYUMN, CAT! YOU JUST GOT ROASTED!!!  
> Willow: Shut up, Maxi.  
> HEY THAT'S MY LINE!  
> Maxi: No, it was too early to be your line.  
> Bob: What the hell are we talking about?  
> My line can go anywhere I want it to go. This is MY story!  
> Maxi: Yeah, and we're not here... except Bob.  
> SHUT UP, MAXI! YOU DON'T LOVE ME ANYWAYS!  
> Willow: Right on cue.  
> damn im bored. shoulda downloaded nirvana when i had wifi...
> 
> Next chapter, a scientist-doctor treats a badly burnt hand! An artist and a programmer meet each other again! A cashier visits his graveyard boyfriend! A therapist talks about his troubles to one of his two best friends! Isn't that ironic?
> 
> DRAMA ACTION POSSIBLE BLOODSHED!!


	3. in which Sci questions why Edge would ever want to get together with Blue, Ink forgets to eat until 8:34 PM, Geno takes a walk through a graveyard and Dream confesses that he has a crush on Cross, but not to Cross

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In other news, Error has probably been to see Sci 69 times in a month, Ink has Forgetful 100, and Geno definitely 100% totally didn't see Error while he was at work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pretty soon, I might be making chapters with 5 POVs to get the word count up. Also, yay! I didn't drop this project after 2 chapters! ALSO! The end notes are really, really fucking long, but with some VERY mild spoilers (aside from the usual) and a Little Misfortune reference.

**{Sci’s POV}**

“And… there!” Sci announced as he finished wrapping up Edge’s hand. “God, how many times have you been here this month?”  
“I dunno…” Edge admitted. “Prolly, like, sixty-nine or somethin’.” He snorted at the estimate, and so did Sci.  
“Yes. Your estimate is very _humerus.”_ Sci placed his hand on his face and sighed. “You have to be more careful, Edge.”  
“I’m fine. Not like I’m gon’ die from those weak-ass punches those religious bastards throw.” Edge shrugged as if the sheer amount of injuries he got from physical fights was healthy. _At least that injury wasn’t from a fight…_  
“So, how _did_ you burn your hand so badly?” Sci interrogated. There was no way that this was because of someone religious.  
“Flipped a burger wrong while thinkin’ about this cute guy.”  
“Ahh!” Sci was much more interested now. “Tell me, what was the guy like?”  
“Short, pure, fuckin’ adorable… Worst quality is the fact that he’s a religious bastard.”  
Sci’s jaw surely would have popped off if he hadn’t placed his hand under it to stop it from falling. _Well… at least he didn’t get the burn because he was in a_ fight _with someone religious._ “So… what was this guy’s name?”  
“Blue, I think.”  
_Blue? Where have I heard that name before…_ Sci realized quickly who Blue was. “Oh, Blue! He’s one of my patients, and before you ask, yes, he is single.”  
Edge’s mood seemed to lift… a lot, until it dropped again. “Mkay. Thanks. I'mma go now.” Edge attempted to pull out his wallet, but winced in pain as he tried to move his right hand. “Ow, fucking burn!”  
“It’s fine. I’ll just bill you later.”  
“You’re the best, Sci.” Edge vanished into thin air, leaving Sci to question why the hell Edge would want to date someone like Blue.

**{Ink’s POV}**

Ink had been working on his art for a good… probably seven or eight hours when the hunger finally made itself noticed. Ink instantly dropped his brush and groaned. This happened all the time. He would get so focused on art that he would forget to eat, and when he finally remembered to eat, it would be...  
The clock on his desk read, “20:34”.  
Nine and a half hours, not eight. That was how long he’d been working.  
His hand was now hurting from the realization that he’d worked non-stop for nine hours. The nearest place was the local fast food joint…  
Ink decided to go there.

~timeskip brought to you by a hungry ink deciding to walk and nine hours of non-stop arting~

After what seemed like forever (but was actually probably only 10 minutes), Ink made it and was finally opening the door… only to see that Error was there.  
Error seemed to notice, too, because they stared at each other for about a minute.  
“So,” Error began, “what are you doing here?”  
“Eating.” What else would Ink be doing? “I actually haven’t done that yet today.”  
“So, you’re here to eat?” The cashier that Ink swore he knew but couldn’t remember the name of, teleported in front of Ink, startling him. “What can I get ya?”  
“Well, what do you sell?”  
“Exactly what you think we do… and what’s on the menu.”  
“Okay. I’ll have… uh…” Ink approached the menu to get a better look at it. There were burgers, hot dogs, fries, salads and a bunch of other stuff.  
“What do people like?”  
“Classic’s ’dogs are the best,” Error called out.  
For some reason, the word Classic sparked deja vu in Ink.  
“Guess I’ll have one of those, then,” Ink decided.  
“One ’dog, coming up!” The shorter skeleton teleported away, and Ink decided to sit next to Error, who tensed up immediately.  
“Oh, am I too close?” Ink asked. He really hoped that he wasn’t.  
“Um, yeah, kinda. It’s fine, though.”  
“Okay.”  
“So… how often do you come here?” Error questioned.  
Ink thought about it for a minute. “Probably every time I get so caught up in my art that I forget that I need to eat. I’m not very good with memory, so I’m impressed that I remembered your name until now, Error.”  
Error’s face seemed to change color, but Ink chalked it up to overactive imagination. “And… how often do you forget to eat?”  
“Pretty much every time. How about you? How often do _you_ come here?”  
“When I’m too lazy to make something myself. By the way, your hot dog just arrived.”  
Ink was confused for a moment. “My wha-OH! Right.” He turned to the cashier who brought him the hot dog. “Thanks.”  
“No prob.”  
Ink took a bite of the hot dog, and a sensation of deliciousness instantly hit his nonexistent tongue.  
“I take it you like it?” Error asked.  
“Damn, it’s good.”  
“Well, _frank_ you very much,” the cashier punned.  
All three of them snickered at the pun, until the cashier teleported away.  
“So… can I have your number and possibly address?” Error asked Ink.  
“Sure, but only if you give me yours. I might decide to visit you, yanno.”  
Ink took out a piece of paper out of his scarf and ripped it in approximately half. He gave one half and a pencil to Error. They exchanged phone numbers and addresses and continued to speak for a long time.

**{Geno’s POV}**

Geno walked back to his apartment after a long day at work. He had totally forgotten who it was that he saw! Yeah! Totally.  
Without realizing it, he walked into the local graveyard. _God, life just keeps on dragging me here._  
Oh, well. Guess he was taking a walk through the graveyard.  
As he entered the graveyard, he had this Feeling of being watched.  
As he passed various tombstones, he saw various other skeletons mourning their loved ones. He passed by them without a word and continued through, the Feeling of being watched refusing to leave him.  
Eventually, he arrived at the far end of the graveyard. To turn back now would just make his walk longer.  
“Thinking of leaving, or waiting for me~?”  
Geno jumped at the sudden social interaction, readying multiple attacks, before registering the voice as belonging to Reaper, his totally-not-boyfriend.  
“Pff, holy crap!" Reaper laughed. "You just tried to kill me! That would have been so ironic. Anyways, I scared your nonexistent ass off, didn’t I?”  
“Hell yeah, you did,” Geno confirmed furiously. “You scared me half to _death._ I thought you were, like, the Grim _Reaper_ or something.”  
Reaper snorted at the puns. “Yeah, well, I had to make a lasting impression. Otherwise, you wouldn’t notice me and my sexy bod. Then again, you have hot bones, too~!”  
Geno could almost see himself blushing. “Sh-Shut up, you idiot.”  
“Anyways,” Reaper shrugged, “it’s late. You could stay at my place for the night. We could chat over a nice, hot cup of tea, or we could watch a movie, or we could do something… more~”  
“Oh my fucking god…” Geno chuckled. “Ah, what the hell. I’ll come. We're not doing _that,_ though.”  
“Whatever, I’ll meet you there.” Reaper vanished, leaving Geno alone. It was at times like these that he was glad that he knew where Reaper lived.

**{Dream’s POV}**

Dream teleported to the local fast food place that he had just visited that morning. He’d had a long day of doing basically nothing, aside from the therapy session with Cross.  
God, Cross was hot.  
Opening the door, he saw some random guy saying goodbye to Ink, and Ink saying goodbye back. The guy passed Dream on his way out, and Dream took the spot in the table across from Ink.  
“Oh, hey, Dream!” Ink greeted Dream.  
“Lemme guess,” Dream sighed. “You forgot to eat. Again.”  
“Howwd yuu noh?” Ink asked through Frankfurter.  
“Ew, don’t talk with food in your mouth. It’s gross.”  
Ink shrugged in response. “Yeah, whatever. So, why are you here?”  
“I was hoping to get some alone time, but talking with you is about as good as I’m gonna get.”  
“What do you wanna talk about?”  
“Something that I can’t talk about with Blue because he’d fucking kill me.”  
“Yes, he would definitely kill you for swearing, unless you’re damning someone to Hell for all eternity,” Ink agreed.  
“Not that,” Dream facepalmed. At least Ink remembered _some_ things, like how Blue was incredibly religious. “So, do you know this guy by the name of Cross?”  
“Never met him, but you talk about him all the time. Isn’t he, like, your client or something?”  
“Yeah. There is one problem, though…”  
“You can’t stop judging him, which is impacting your work ethic?”  
“No, the dude’s super hot!”  
Ink blinked. There was a tense moment of silence before he answered, “What are we talking about again?”  
_Dammit, Ink…_ “How Blue would kill me if he found out that I have a crush on Cross.”  
“Why?”  
“The Bible has this whole anti-gay section,” Dream answered.  
“Oh. Tell me more about this Cross guy.”  
“Well, he’s my client. He’s depressed, socially anxious, hot as fuck…”  
“That last one isn’t a mental condition.”  
Dream grabbed Ink by the sleeves and pulled him close. “I think he tried to kiss me. I almost kissed back. It took every bit of mental restraint that I had not to.”  
“So, you like each other?” Ink asked.  
“I… I think.”  
“Well, ask him out.”  
“THAT’S THE PROBLEM!!! One, I get next to no opportunities to. Two, he’s my client, and it would change the whole atmosphere of our meetings. Three, whenever I think I have an opportunity, something seems to just completely stop me from asking him!”  
“Then he should ask you out.”  
“If that happened, I’d probably die of either shock or happiness.”  
“Then maybe someone could set you two up on a da-”  
Dream held up a hand to stop Ink from continuing. “Okay, thank you, Ink, that is enough. Say, why don’t you tell me about the guy who was here earlier?”  
“Oh, Error? Yeah, he’s a great guy. Haphephobic, but still great. He really likes computers and knows a lot about them. I prefer writing and drawing by hand, but that’s just me. I ran into him - literally - at the store earlier while buying paint. Oh, he also knows how to knit! And…”  
Dream eventually tuned Ink out and fell asleep in the middle of whatever Ink was saying.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Willow: So focused that you forget to eat… Who does that remind me of?  
> Maxi: I dunno. Maxils, who does that remind you of?  
> Reminds me of the fact that you aren’t actually here.  
> Bob: Any specific human?  
> Nope.  
> Willow: It’s you, dolt.  
> Shut up, Cat. I ate while writing this.  
> Maxi: So, do I need to remind you?  
> No. I’m not gonna say the thing this time, especially considering that you jumped on my damn head last night. That’s all the proof I need.  
> Maxi: I’m sorry, okay?!  
> Willow: I was a witness. You are guilty. Go to prison now.  
> Maxi: Fuck you, Cat.  
> Willow: Woah! You hate me? I had no idea!  
> Bob: Why are we doing this?  
> Willow: Shut up, Bob.  
> Maxi: We hardly talk about the actual story in these sections. Are we going to question why Sci’s jaw would have fallen off… if he’s a Sans?  
> No, we are not. Also, the capitalized F in Feeling of being watched is an Undertale reference.  
> Bob: So, when’s Error gonna find out about the dark secret that Ink is hiding?  
> Willow: Probably never, because Maxils is probably never gonna get this damn story done.  
> Crap, I used up my shut up Cat. I’ve made it this far, and I intend to actually do shit with it. Probably chapter [REDACTED] or [REDACTED], Bob.  
> Maxi: So, when are you going to introduce-  
> SHUT UP, MAXI! NO SPOILERS! Anyways, yes, I am going to introduce a new Sans or two… soon. Possibly three. I dunno yet.  
> Willow: Maxi, stop spoiling the whole damn story.  
> Bob: Maxils, why don’t you explain how you think up ideas for your stories?  
> Oh, that’s simple. I start by thinking of a concept on the Text app (not textING, just Google’s version of Notepad) on my Chromebook. Sometimes, I’ll plan stuff out on a Text document before typing, but in the case of the first two chapters, I didn’t do that. I did for this chapter, though, because I couldn’t think of shit for Sci to do. After I do that, I get to writing the actual story itself.  
> Willow: You still have AU Bullshit 1 to put up.  
> Once I get the story into the thing on the Archive, I work on the summary, beginning notes and end notes, but this story is an exception. For this one, I wrote this roleplay section on Google Docs. During end note creation (except here, ill do that once i get to posting), I decide on what four main events of the next chapter will be. I do not name names, but the first character mention in each is the character that will get the POV. The POVs go in that nonsensical order which only made sense last chapter.  
> Willow: POST AU BULLSHIT 1, DAMMIT!  
> I name the chapters after what happens in the story, and the summary is three other events from the story. The beginning notes are minor spoilers as to when certain characters will appear/have a POV. For my 100 Prompts challenge-  
> Willow: Update that.  
> I did EVERYTHING inside of Google Docs, except basic idea planning.  
> Willow: So, when are Dream and Cross gonna kiss for reals?  
> Eventually, Little Misfortune.  
> damn i wanna just skip ahead and start working on the other chapters  
> DAMN THIS WAS A LONG END NOTES
> 
> Next chapter, a butcher goes too early to see his favorite stripper! A cashier argues against sleeping in a bed because he'd rather sleep on the couch! A good Christian pureboi runs into the fast food worker that he totally doesn't like! A police officer stops three mysterious strangers! No police racism.
> 
> DRAMA ACTION POSSIBLE BLOODSHED!


	4. in which Horror and Lust make out (a lot), Geno attempts to sleep on a very hard couch, Blue is very confusion and Black is very boredom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In other news, Reaper is gonna be scared to death when he wakes up, Edge calls Blue by his name, and two people go missing. Wait that's actual news-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two of the three mysterious new characters, you probably recognize. The one that you probably don't is intentionally unrecognizable.

**{Horror’s POV}**   
It was early at night. Horror knew that. However, he decided to go early anyways. What mysterious force compelled him to do this?  
Lust.  
Not just Lust, but the supposed sin.  
Horror and Lust had a more… intimate relationship with each other than with anyone else. Hell, the other strippers at the damn club probably weren’t dating anyone. However, both Horror and Lust enjoyed that.  
_How long do I have left to wait?_ Horror checked his watch. It was 9:15 PM. Damn, was he early. The club wouldn’t open for another two hours, almost, and Lust didn’t normally arrive until 10 at the earliest.  
Out of the corner of his eyesocket, he could see that tonight was an exception, thank god.  
“Oh, Horror!~” Lust greeted him, pulling him close for a kiss. “You’re early~”  
“Yeah, I know. Just couldn’t wait to see ya~” They continued kissing until Horror tapped Lust on the side to signal that someone was walking past.  
It wasn’t someone that Horror recognized. They looked all dark and goopy and hentai-y… sort of like something straight out of a nightmare. Looking again, he saw two others, both actual skeletons. One of them glared at Horror, but continued walking.  
“Those people were weird,” Lust said after they were out of earshot.  
“Yeah…” Horror agreed, before adding, “So, where were we?~”

**{Geno’s POV}**

“It’s late, and we should probably get to sleep,” Reaper informed Geno. “At least, you should. How about sleeping in my bed?”  
“No thanks. I’ll just sleep on the couch,” Geno insisted. He almost never used his bed. The couch was about a billion times more comfortable, and not just at his apartment. Besides, here, it was Reaper’s bed, and Geno didn’t want to take up the whole bed!  
“I insist that you sleep on an actual bed,” Reaper _reap_ eated, slight agitation in his voice.  
Geno stayed where he was. “No, the couch is much more comfortable.”  
“No, it’s not,” Reaper affirmed. “The couch is like a rock. Trust me, I’ve slept on it before. That was the first and last time I sleep on it.”  
“Is it, like, filled with rocks or something?” Geno asked. That was pretty much the only way Reaper could stop him from sleeping on the couch. Reaper didn’t seem to know that.  
“Well, no, but-”  
“Then I’m sleeping on the couch.”  
“Damn, you’re stubborn… but I like that in a guy~”  
“Oh, shut up.” Geno covered his face with the scarf that he kept on at all times. He hadn’t taken that scarf off since… the fight.  
Reaper sat down in a thoughtful position for a minute. _What the hell are you up to now?_  
“I’ll make you a deal,” Reaper began. “If you don’t think that the couch is that bad, I’ll let you sleep on it.”  
“What’s the catch?” There was always a catch when it came to ‘deals’ made with Reaper. Geno knew that better than anyone.  
“If you can’t fall asleep, you have to sleep in my bed…” There was a short pause. “With me~”  
Geno felt his skull heat up at the thought. He wasn’t going to lose this bet, though! Not in a billion years! “I accept your challenge.”  
Reaper left, and Geno went to the couch…  
which turned out to actually be hard as a rock. Never in his life had Geno slept (or, at least, tried to sleep) on something so hard, except possibly the floor.

~timeskip brought to you by rock-hard couches and a supposed fight~

After about seventeen minutes of tossing and turning, Geno gave up and went to tell Reaper the news.  
“Okay, you win. No sex, though.”  
Reaper was sound asleep. Geno had to admit that it was adorable.  
He crawled into the bed, next to Reaper. Hopefully, Reaper would be the first one awake, and Geno would get his revenge.  
The bed turned out to be much softer than the couch, and almost as soft as Geno’s own couch. Geno fell asleep quickly and soundlessly.

**{Blue’s POV}**

Blue made his way back home from the church. That church always seemed to be a mess after everyone left, and Blue was always happy to volunteer to help clean. His Minecraft friends would probably be wondering where Blue was, though. It didn’t help that Blue didn’t have a driver’s license (really, only the cops had licenses) and that the church was nearly a three hour walk from his house. Oh, well. Exercise was good for your health, anyways.  
_Sure, it’s not like skeletons have any muscles to exercise or organs to keep healthy, but it’s still important._  
Blue hadn’t expected to be out this late, though. He also couldn’t help but wonder how Edge was doing.  
Well, he didn’t have to, because Edge was on a bench, right in front of Blue.  
“Oh, hello, Edge,” Blue greeted him.  
Edge seemed startled by Blue’s existence. “Wh-what do you want, y-you religious bastard? You got a _bone to pick_ with me or somethin’?”  
“Hey! It’s not nice to use language like that!” Blue reprimanded Edge before realizing the pun.  
“Listen, there are three ways I can describe how you look right now, and two of them contain swears.”  
“What’s the third way?”  
“Uh, um…” Edge seemed to be struggling for words. “Like an adorable blueberry, I guess.”  
Blue was... certainly not expecting _that_ to be the response.  
“You also looked pissed when you realized that I made a pun, and you look like shit in general, but not in the overly bad way. The exhausted way.”  
Why was Edge being so nice to him? Earlier, Edge had come at Blue with a pan, ready to kill him, and now? Compliments. Just how confusing could one person get?!  
“Now, don’t get the wrong idea. S’not like I like you or anythin’.” Apparently, the answer was even more. “However, I could teleport ya home… if you told me where you live and hold my left hand while I’m doin’ it.”  
“Why your left in particular?”  
“Burnt my right hand cookin’.” Edge held up his right hand, which was bandaged. Even in the darkness, Blue could see some scorch marks along Edge’s phalanges. “It hurts like shit.”  
“Oh, no! Are you okay?” Blue asked, approaching Edge cautiously.  
“S’fine. Now, let’s get your religious ass home.”  
_Rude._ “Alright.” He took Edge’s left hand in his own and whispered the address into Edge’s ‘ear.’ Within an instant, they teleported to Blue’s place. “That was fast.”  
“Yeah, that’s how teleportation works. Anyways, see ya around, Blue,” Edge waved as he teleported away.  
_He called me by my name._ Edge was just full of surprises.

**{Black’s POV}**

Black drove through the town, searching for criminal activity. Oh, how he _loathed_ the night shift. This town was way too damn peaceful to have much criminal activity. The only shit that happened was during the day, and all because of one guy.  
That was when Black spotted his opportunity for action. Three shady-looking guys walking along the sidewalk. One was a giant tentacle monster of black goopiness from straight out of a nightmare. Another was wearing a hoodie with an unnerving dust-colored hood. The third was wearing this really weird outfit that belonged in a circus, and was moving so quietly that you’d think he was an illusion. Come to think of it, none of them had footsteps... Black drove up to the trio.  
“So, this town is boring as fuck. Mind entertaining me for a bit?” he asked casually. If these guys were criminals, he’d make sure that they let him know what the hell they were doing.  
“And what the hell do you want with us?” the hooded one asked.  
“Just a friendly chat.”  
“Should we give it to him?” the weird skeleton chuckled.  
The black goop monster silenced him. “We’re just passing through.”  
“Not from around here, eh?”  
“Yeah. I’m actually the only one that’s ever been here before.”  
“Hey, can we get back to our walk?” The hooded skeleton requested. Everything about this guy seemed off, from the dust-colored hood to the glowing red eye. In fact, everything about _all_ of them seemed off.  
“Yeah,” the circus guy agreed. “Let’s go!”  
“These two just want to explore, so if you’ll excuse us, we’ll be on our way,” the goop guy sighed.  
“Alright. Don’t cause any trouble.”  
“Got it.”  
The three of them continued walking, and Black got back to patrolling the town for any crime to bust.

~timeskip brought to you by three mysterious people and two timeskips this chapter~

It was one hour later that Black received two missing person reports at once.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> But I don't wanna take a break ;^;  
> Maxi: You're taking a break, and that's final.  
> Willow: *duct tapes my mouth* We'll do the talking.  
> Bob: So, Maxils decided to add in the Sans that she randomly thought up late at night... uh... how many days ago was it?  
> *shrugs silently*  
> Maxi: Can we explain him?  
> *nods*  
> Willow: Okay, so, Maxils thought up that weird skeleton. His name is Illusion. His powers revolve around illusions.  
> Maxi: He's basically a mix between Jevil and the Joker.  
> Sdmmphf.  
> Bob: She said stop. No more spoiling.  
> Maxi: Anyways, the other two are fairly obvious.  
> Willow: Maxils actually wrote most of the first section really late last night.  
> Bob: Also, three of the four POVs here contained shipping.  
> Willow: *counts quickly* Just like in Chapter 2.  
> Maxi: And unlike in Chapter 1, with two containing shipping , and Chapter 3, which had shipping in all four, if you count Ink's POV.  
> Willow: Which I do.  
> *rips duct tape off* Shut up cat. Anyways, OW MOTHER FUCK THAT HURT!  
> Maxi: Damn, I thought that'd hold her.  
> SHUT UP, MAXI! YOU DON'T LOVE ME, ANYWAYS!!!  
> Bob: And there it is.  
> damn it's early to be posting a chapter  
> Maxi: That's because you precrastinated... for once.  
> YEET! *log rolls out*  
> Willow: Welp. Anyways, Maxils wants your opinion on whether you want some Papyruses to appear or not.  
> YEETUS ROLLETUS!*log rolls back in* Yeah put a comment in on your opinion. also 5 povs next chapter but that will mean less frequent updates  
> Maxi: NOW EAT DAMN YOU  
> Nuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-  
> break will probably be after i make chap 6  
> Willow: You will take Saturdays and Sundays off from posting.  
> Maxi: You need sleep.  
> One, Saturday is understandable because it's when I update my CYOA on the forum. Sunday, though? No. I'll take Sat off, and... uh... yeah just saturday.  
> Bob: Damn it, Maxils...
> 
> Next chapter, a programmer can't stop thinking about an artist! A graveyard manager gets the scare of his life! A fast food worker brings his trombone to work! An illusionist questions his boss's decisions! A dank memer finds the location of a cashier's apartment! God help me...
> 
> DRAMA ACTION POSSIBLE BLOODSHED


	5. in which Error stares at a phone until 5:30 AM, Reaper injures his shoulder, Classic plays Bella Notte on his trombone, Illusion is told to recruit the people he saw at the nightclub and Fresh speaks more Cringegodish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In other news, Error does a fuck-up related to Ink, Geno calls Reaper Reapy, Dream has a Nightmare-induced panic attack, and Illusion had one job.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Four new challengers approach! (even tho I only said 3)  
> Illusion - Illusionist/Criminal (because he’s evil and his name is illusion)  
> Nightmare - Slightly Murderous Criminal (because he’s evil. Error is just angsty in this story. Horror and Lust might become evil… or only one of them. Maybe neither. Who knows? (The answer is not me because I have no sense of planning.))  
> Dust - Murderous Criminal (because dust)  
> Killer - Murderous Criminal (because killer)  
> This brings us up to 18 characters that I might possibly do POVs for. Yes, I do know that I still have to do Lust’s POV from the original 14.

**{Error’s POV}**

Error stared at the phone. He had lost track of time and still hadn’t fallen asleep… but maybe he had, and he was dreaming? He had no clue. Probably almost 24 hours ago, he had wanted to destroy this phone, and now?   
Now, he was actually hoping that the damn phone would ring. He also hoped for no prank calls or stupid questions.   
What he was really hoping for was Ink to call.   
He didn’t dare check the time, because he knew that it would be really, really early in the morning.   
When the phone rang, he picked it up instantly.   
“Hello?”   
“Hi, I’d like to order a large pepperoni pizza with extra ketchup on top.”   
“Classic, what the fuck do you want?”   
“Just wanna know how your relationship with Ink is goin’.”   
One, how did Classic know Ink’s name? Error decided not to ask that one. Two, “What relationship?”   
“Well, he sat next to you-”   
“CASUALLY,” Error hissed through the phone.   
“Yeah, but you gave him you phone number and address-”   
“FRIENDS do that all the time.” Error was gripping the phone so hard that it might shatter.   
“You two were at the same place at the same time-”   
“By sheer coincidence.”   
“Also, what are you doin’ up at-”   
“DON’T. TELL ME. THE TIME.”   
“Why? Because you don’t wanna know how long you’ve been waiting for Ink to call you?”   
_ Aw, shit! He figured it out! _ That was exactly the reason why. “No.”   
“Bro. Every skeleton in this damn town, save for two or three, is amazing at telling whether someone else is lying or not. Also, your voice glitches more when you’re nervous.”   
“Shut the fuck up before I come over there and kill you.”   
“Aw, you’re so  _ bone _ ly. Hope your  _ boyfriend  _ comes by. Also, it’s five thirty in the morning.”   
Error slammed down the phone. Why couldn’t Classic learn to mind his own damn business… and just listen when Error asked him not to say the time?   
There was another call seconds later. Error picked up the phone and screeched, “WHY!”   
“Uh… okay. Bye.”   
Fuck.  
That was Ink’s voice.   
Error slammed his head down on the desk repeatedly.  _ STUPID! STUPID! STUPID! _

**{Reaper’s POV}**

Reaper opened his eyesockets slightly and the light scorched his eyesockets. He was never a morning person.   
_ God, Geno won the bet, didn’t “h _ OLY SHIT!” Reaper jumped back upon seeing Geno… in his bed… FACING HIM. He proceeded to fall off the bed, hitting his shoulder bone on the nightstand and then almost hitting the floor, but managed to teleport back onto the bed at the last second.   
Geno hadn’t been disturbed by that at all… somehow. Reaper also hadn’t been disturbed by Geno climbing into the bed with him.   
Reaper mumped onto the floor. “You bastard!” he yelled, his shoulder bone aching from hitting the nightstand.   
“Mmm… wha?” Geno muttered sleepily. Reaper had to admit that it was absolutely adorable.  _ Geno _ was adorable.   
“Why the fuck didn’t you wake me?” Reaper couldn’t bring himself to use an angered tone of voice.   
Geno’s eyesocket blinked open. “What the… Oh. Hey, Reapy.”   
_ HOLYCRAPHEJUSTCALLEDMEREAPYAAAAAAAA- _   
“Pfft. Guess I got my revenge.”   
Reaper scowled as much as skeletons could scowl. “Revenge? I almost died!”   
“Oh.” Geno’s grin faltered and his one visible eyelight vanished. “Sorry. Are you okay?”   
“Hit my shoulder on the nightstand, but…” He realized that he still had his cloak on from last night. Ignoring that fact, he pulled off his hood and checked on his shoulder. “Yeah, it’ll be fine. No fracture. Wake me up next time you decide to crawl into my bed… and from the side I’m on.”  
“Okay. Sorry.”   
“It’s fine. I’ll make us breakfast.”   
“No, you’re hurt, and I haven’t redeemed myself.” Geno threw himself out of the bed. He was still wearing the same scarf, the same shorts and the same bloodstained t-shirt. “You get back into bed.”   
Another trait Reaper loved about Geno was that he always gave a damn. Two damns, in the case of Reaper.   
“Fine.”   
Reaper got back into bed, snuggling himself under the blanket. He fell back asleep before Geno brought him breakfast.

**{Classic’s POV}**

Sans had teleported to work, as usual. He had completed everything on his checklist : make a couple of hot dogs for the morning, wipe down the desks, bring his trombone…   
Ah, yes. His trombone.   
He had been planning on torturing Error with it, but he had completely forgotten, so he was gonna torture everyone else with its melodious sound!   
He snickered quietly as he turned the sign into the ‘OPEN’ position. Instantly, a skeleton wearing black and white (and an odd locket) entered the building. Sans knew this skeleton as Cross, or Dream’s  _ dream _ husband. Cross knew Sans as Classic, or that one guy who makes really bad jokes and really good hot dogs.   
“Hey, Class.”   
“Hey.” Sans considered mentioning what he had overheard yesterday, but was interrupted by Cross.   
“Why is there a trombone on the counter?”   
Classic froze for a good second before answering, “How do you know that it’s a trombone and not a trumpet?”   
“Because I’ve seen a trombone before. Lemme guess, you’re going to play Christmas carols while everyone is eating?” Cross suggested. Well, Sans took it as a suggestion.   
“Ooh, good idea. Don’t tell anyone, though. I’m kinda hoping that it’s a surprise,” he winked. “Also, I was planning on playing NGGYU.” Sans hoped that Cross didn’t know what NGGYU was an acronym for.   
“Oh. I’ve never heard of that song.”   
_ Score 1 Sans. _ “Oh, it’s a great song. You shouldn’t look it up, though. Wait until someone else comes in.”   
Just as he said that, Dream entered. This was, like, the eighth time this week or something? Maybe even ninth.   
“Speak of the devil.”   
Cross turned around. “Dream?!”   
“CROSS?!”   
Both of them started blushing like maniacs, and Cross muttered something resembling the words “shut up.”   
Sans took this as an opportunity to whisper to himself, “Hm… Yes… The shipping here is made out of shipping.” He put on his best fake accent. “Boujour, monsieurs, and welcome to zee locale ‘Fast Food’ restaurant. Allow moi to guide you to your seats.”   
“Classic, nooooo…” Dream groaned.   
“Ah, Classic oui!” Sans took a moment to convince himself that he didn’t snicker. “Come, will you not?” He guided the two to a two-seated table, and they sat down, still blushing.   
“I must play zee best music for this occasion!” He got out two hot dogs that he had prepared earlier, and once Cross and Dream had them, Sans picked up his trombone and began playing “Bella Notte” from the movie Lady and the Tramp.   
“Oh, god…” Cross snickered. "That's not even a song sung by French guys..."   
As Sans continued playing the music, he watched as Dream and Cross picked up the same half-eaten hot dog without looking. They turned to take a bite…   
and they ended up kissing.  
The scream that they let out was absolutely beautiful, and Sans tried (and probably failed) to keep playing without laughing his nonexistent ass off.   
It turned out that Edge had walked in at the exact time that Dream and Cross kissed and was snorting  _ his _ nonexistent ass off.   
When the song ended, Sans was sure that he was going to dust from laughter.  
“Oh my fucking god - when you -y-you two k-kiss-ki-kissed, the-the look- THE LOOK ON YOUR DAMN FACES!”   
Edge turned on the TV to the news and everybody shut up when they heard the words, “Two people mysteriously vanished last night. Both of the scenes appear to have a mysterious black goop around them.”   
Dream’s eyesockets widened at the images of the alleged black goop. “It… it can’t be…”   
“Please be on the lookout for these three suspects.”   
A hentai monster, and insane-looking skeleton and a skeleton wearing a various mix of rainbow colors - not Fresh, though - were shown.   
“No, no, no, he’s supposed to be dead! How did he not die? Where the hell did he go? WHY DID HE LEAVE?!” Dream looked like he was on the verge of a panic attack.   
“Holy crap, Dream, are you okay?!” Sans asked worriedly.   
“N-n-” Sans thought for a moment that Dream would say no, but instead, he whispered, “Nightmare…”

**{Illusion’s POV}**

Illusion shut off the TV. “I told you idiots that the plan would fail!” he yelled.   
“Hey, watch who you’re talking to,” Nightmare scolded furiously.   
“Yes, boss…” Illusion nodded meekly.   
“Who’s idea was it to invite  _ him _ into our gang again?” Dust asked.   
Killer shrugged unknowingly. “Well, he only serves one purpose, and he can’t even succeed at that…”   
“Excuse me you, I can fight if I fucking want to!” Illusion snarled. “You mess with me, you’ll be  _ illusion _ your fucking life. Unless you’re Nightmare, that is,” he added quickly out of fear.   
“You had one job, Illusion. One more fuck-up like this and you’re dead,” Dust threatened, putting a knife close to Illusion’s throat. “Also, you got my face wrong.”   
“I did that with all three of the illusions on purpose so if we’re seen in public, we won’t be recognized as easily.”   
“Boss, why did we have to set up base in this town, of all places?” Killer groaned. “The most entertaining place here is the fast food place, and that’s saying something.”   
Nightmare remained silent.   
“Maybe Boss’s got a grudge against someone here?”   
“You could say that…” Nightmare answered.   
“A bunch of grudges?” Illusion put in excitedly.   
“Yeah. Let’s go with that.”   
Illusion nodded and looked around. The place seemed kind of empty… and then he remembered what they were doing last night. “Hey, hey, remember that one guy from the nightclub?”   
“Which one?” Dust asked.   
“Uh… both of them, I guess. Maybe we could try getting them to join us?”   
Nightmare gave him a look of contemplation. “Hm…”   
Killer snickered, “The boss doesn’t like y-”   
“Good idea… for once.”   
“WHAT THE FUCK?” Killer and Dust objected as Illusion let in a long gasp.   
“Yeah!”   
“You can do it by yourself,” Nightmare added.   
Illusion’s mood instantly dropped to zero.   
HOW THE HELL WAS HE SUPPOSED TO DO THIS BY HIMSELF?!

**{Fresh’s Cringe God Help Me}**

Fresh entered the fast food joint to see Dream having a panic attack. He knew it was a panic attack because he’d seen Error during those states.   
“Yo, what the funk’s goin’ on up in this joint?” Fresh asked.   
“Nightmare… It’s him… He died… How…”   
“Deep breaths, Dream,” the guy standing next to Dream instructed.   
“Dream here just had a panic attack,” Edge notified Fresh.   
“Yeah, I can see that, broski. I wanna know why.”   
Ink burst into the building. “Nightmare’s back!”   
“Nightmare? As in, THE Nightmare?” Fresh asked. He had heard rumors that the dude existed, mostly from Error. Okay, maybe they weren’t rumors.   
“You know Nightmare?” Ink asked.   
“Totes, brah. He’s, like, mega evil.”   
“Okay, let’s just talk about this,” Classic suggested.   
Everyone agreed.

~timeskip brought to you by fresh’s cringe and nightmare existing~

After Dream had calmed down and everything had gone back to normal, Fresh pulled Ink aside.   
“Hey, so, remember Geno?”   
“No. I hardly remember you.”   
“Ah.” Ink seemed to have the memory of a goldfish. “The guy with the glitchy eye.”   
“Oh, yeah! He lives at my apartment building. Why are you asking?”   
“So, I’m lookin’ for him. So, where’s yer apartment building?”   
“It’s along Green Street.”   
Oh, hey. Fresh had been there before. “Coolio. Ya know which number he lives in?”   
“Uh, I think I saw him walking out of apartment 128.” Ink lifted up his scarf. “Yeah, that was the one.”   
“Thanks, brah.”   
“No problem.” Ink walked away, leaving Fresh one step closer to finding Geno.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While writing Sans’ POV, I realized that I could have made him a comedian.  
> Willow: Let me in! LET ME IN!!!!!!!!!!  
> I decided that Edge needed someone to work with… and that someone needed to make the food while Edge is injured.  
> This section will be dedicated to the STORY today. Because of this, it was made in Google Docs.  
> I am considering putting Outertale Sans into this story so he can be a side character.  
> Maxi: MAXILS DEMONSTRATED HER FRENCH KNOWLEDGE DURING SANS’ POV, ALL WHILE GRINNING LIKE AN IDIOT!!!  
> damn sans’ pov went from 0 to 11 fast  
> When thinking of a street name for Ink’s apartment building, I thought green. Therefore, Green.  
> Also, I present to you... ILLUSION!  
> um so APPARENTLY I managed to get this done FASTER than my other chapters. I was actually almost halfway done by the time I got off of my bus.  
> The whole Papyruses question is still open for answers, by the way.  
> Wow. Two chapters in one day!  
> Bob: Hi.  
> BOB HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET IN HERE.  
> Bob: I’m your hands.  
> Willow: MAXILS LET ME THE FUCK IN!  
> Shut up, Cat. I was trying to shorten this.  
> god the story is even a good length
> 
> Next chapter, a therapist panics over the fact that his brother is alive! A stripper and his butcher boyfriend meet an illusionist! An artist visits his programmer friend! A writer goes for a walk with his therapist! A cashier, for the first time in probably years, sees his- *mouth is duct-taped*  
> Willow: No big spoilers, Maxils!!  
> *rips off duct tape* It’s called INSPIRATION, from Mo- *Willow reapplies duct tape*
> 
> Maxi: Drama, action, possible bloodshed, Maxils challenges you to figure out what the big reveal is.
> 
> how did this get posted twice?


	6. in which Dream feels like he's gonna throw up, Lust and Horror join Nightmare's gang, Ink forgets why he wanted to see Error, Cross hear's Dream's monologue about Nightmare and Geno just wants to fucking sleep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In other news, Fresh pulls Ink aside, Horror has offered Lust a certain reward, Ink collapses in front of his arting stuff, and Chara is a dick to Cross.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're actually getting into some plot here! Lotsa shipping, too. In fact, all five sections contain shipping!

**{Dream’s POV}**

Dream felt as if he was going to throw up.  
“Just keep breathing…” Cross instructed. Dream, in all of his current lightheadedness, did so. The other voices were communicating, and everything seemed blurry.  
Dream could pick up a few words, such as, “Nightmare,” “Dangerous,” “Criminal” and “Others.” He couldn’t pick out coherent sentences, aside from what Cross was saying.  
Today was surely going to be a long day if this kept up.  
Dream could make out Ink heading towards him.  
“Are you okay?” Ink asked.  
“Y-y-yeah, I’ll be… I’ll be fi-fine… yeah, fine,” Dream answered, his voice shaky.  
He’d be fine, so long as he didn’t run into Nightmare.  
Neither he nor Ink could rememer how Nightmare turned into something straight out of hentai, but they both rememered, clear as day (somehow, in Ink’s case), the day that Nightmare had supposedly died.  
It was painful to think about.  
“Do you want to talk about something?” Cross asked, clearly implying Nightmare. That was the last thing Dream wanted to talk about.  
“No… I’m g-good… Thanks, though...”  
Ink looked at them with a confused expression, as if he was confirming whether or not he should ship them.  
“Yo, Ink, can we chit-chat for a minute?” Fresh asked.  
_Fresh knows Ink?_ Between him, Dream and Blue, Ink was the only one who had never met Fresh, as far as Dream knew. Then again, it kind of made sense for them to be friends, considering that the two had something in common.  
“Yeah, sure.”  
“You feeling better now, Dream?” Cross asked after Ink and Fresh were out of earshot  
“Yeah, I’m feeling better. Anyways, about earlier…”  
“How about we talk about that when we’re alone?”  
Dream nodded in agreement, but he could feel Classic’s gaze on him, shipping him with Cross. He decided to ignore that feeling.

**{Lust’s POV}**

Lust walked through the town with Horror by his side. They were taking a nice walk together, one that would be rewarded thoroughly at the end. As Lust stopped to sniff some roses, Horror tapped his shoulder.  
“Look over there.”  
Lust did as Horror instructed, and there was one of the skeletons that had walked past them last night.  
“What the…” The brightly-colored skeleton teleported towards them.  
“Oh, there you are! I saw you two making out last night.”  
“Whatever,” Lust shrugged. This guy was, like, insane or something, and Lust didn’t give a damn if anyone saw him making out with his boyfriend. Horror was the one with any amount of decency whatsoever.  
The weird guy began to speak again after about a minute. “So, my friends think that you would make a cool addition to our gang!” The skeleton was grinning widely. “It was my idea, by the way.”  
“Cool,” Horror said.  
“Yeah… Tell me, is there any catch to joining this gang of yours?” Lust asked. There was always a catch to this sort of thing.  
“Yeah, you just gotta do everything Nightmare says. Nightmare is our leader.”  
“Can we visit without a catch?” Horror interrogated.  
“No.”  
“Well, what do you think, Horror?” Lust asked his boyfriend.  
Horror nodded, “Yeah. Sure. I’ll join.”  
“If he joins, I join,” Lust purred, kissing Horror on the cheek.  
“Great! Let’s go.” The strange character ran past them. Horror and Lust shrugged and followed close behind.

~timeskip brought to you by an unknown reward and horrorlust~

Lust looked around the alley that the strange character had brought him and Horror to. There were two skeletons and a hentai monster, the same one he had seen last night.  
“These are the new recruits?”  
“Yep!” a voice answered from behind Lust, causing him to jump. It was that same weird skeleton… the same one that was right in front of him.  
_Identical twin?_  
“Did you really resort to using your power to get these two to join?” the one with weird lines coming from his eyesockets asked.  
“Well, yes, but actually-”  
“It doesn’t matter, Killer,” the goop monster growled. “Illusion, stop scaring away our new memers.”  
“Yes, Boss…” This ‘Illusion’ guy’s expression turned from proud to despondent. If Lust was going to be honest, these guys were sending _chills down his spine._  
“Now, listen here, you two.” The skeleton wearing the hoodie walked up to them, his eyes glowing fiercely. “By just seeing this place, you have sworn to be loyal to Nightmare for all eternity. Ya don’t do what Nightmare asks? Ya die. Ya call the cops on us? Ya die. Ya tell a single person about this group’s existence?”  
“ _We get it!_ ” Horror and Lust groaned at the same time. _Wait,_ Lust thought. _Did he say call the cops?_  
“Dust, stop torturing the new recruits,” the tentacle monster answered. “Now, tell me… do you know anyone by the name of Dream?”  
“No…” Lust answered. Who the hell was Dream?  
“Hm. Whatever. Go find a seat on either couch.” The tentacle monster pointed to a pair of dirty, worn-out couches, and Lust and Horror took a seat on the same couch. _Well, I guess we’re with these guys now._

**{Ink’s POV}**

Once Dream had calmed down and Ink had finally eaten, the latter decided that it was a good time to go visit Error.  
_He’s probably calmed down at this point. Then again, it’s probably my fault for calling him at 5:30 in the morning…_  
Ink took Broomy out of its holster and painted a circle on the ground. After said circle had been painted, Ink jumped in and appeared at the door to what he could only assume was Error’s house.  
Ink moved his phalange towards the doorbell, questioning whether or not Error would be asleep at the moment. If Ink hadn’t heard the news of Nightmare being alive, he would be napping away right now.  
Ink pressed it, and Error opened the door promptly. “Oh, Ink. Hey.” Ink could see massive bags under Error’s eyesockets. Crap, had he woken Error up?  
“Hi, Error,” Ink replied. A moment later, he forgot why he came.  
“No offense, but you look like shit right now,” Error laughed awkwardly.  
“I do?” Ink asked.  
“Yeah. You have these huge-ass bags under your eyesockets. How much sleep did you get last night?”  
“One, I don’t rememer. Two, you also have dark circles under your eyesockets.” Said bags were hardly visible on Error.  
“I haven’t slept since in twenty-four hours,” Error admitted, rubbing his left eyesocket. “Also, sorry about earlier.” Ink hadn’t woken him up, thank god. “I don’t think I’ll get back to sleep ever again, considering that Nightmare’s ba-” Error shut himself up, like he was revealing something big, but Ink had heard enough.  
“You know Nightmare?”  
“YOU know Nightmare?!”  
“Yeah, he’s Dream’s brother.”  
“Dream was his brother and not just some random guy he hated?” Error muttered, just barely loud enough for Ink to hear. “I thought he was just some evil guy who hated everything and everyone. I never expected him to have a brother.”  
“Well, he used to be like…” Ink paused, trying to put Nightmare’s old personality and appearance into the nicest words he could, but all he came up with was, “not like he is now. Not evil.”  
“So, why are you here?”  
“Uh… I don’t rememer,” Ink shrugged.  
“Then… can I try to get to sleep?”  
“Sure. Bye.” Error closed the door and Ink teleported back to his own apartment, questioning why he didn’t teleport places more often.  
He decided to do a bit of painting.  
The moment all of his things were set up, he collapsed on the paper in front of him.

**{Cross’s POV}**

**“Cross. Dream is right there. You have the chance to kiss him again,”** Chara informed Cross, who was currently taking a walk with Dream. Normally, the two just communicated in thought, since they could do that. They rarely bothered speaking.  
_Chara! Shut up!_ Cross groaned.  
“So… About earlier…” Dream began.  
“Know that I didn’t mean to kiss you OR grab the same hot dog as you,” Cross answered sternly. _And that the idiot whose SOUL is fused with mine didn’t warn me about said incident._ _  
_ “ **Hey! I’m not an idiot!”**  
“...I see.” Dream gained a look of mild… hurt? Sadness? Suspicion? Maybe a mix of all three? Cross couldn’t tell.  
“ **Hurt and sadness are the same thing,”** Chara responded.  
_Well, aren’t you vocal today? SHUT UP._ Cross kept walking beside Dream. “Soooo, do you wanna talk about-”  
“I thought Nightmare died in that fire all those years ago,” Dream sighed. “He had already been corrupted by god knows what at that point.”  
Cross kept silent in the hopes of learning more about Nightmare.  
“I tried to save him from the fire, but Ink stopped me from going so… I’m glad he’s alive, but this means…” Dream trailed off sadly. “Wait. Did I just say all of that out loud?”  
**“Don’t tell him that he was talking to himself.”**  
“Depends on what you mean by ‘all of that’,” Cross replied.  
“God… I must sound so pathetic…” Dream facepalmed, his gaze turning away.  
“No, you sound like someone who misses their brother.” Cross put his hand on Dream’s shoulder. “If you ask me, that’s not pathetic.”  
“It isn’t?” Dream sniffled.  
“Of course not.” Instantly, Cross was pulled into a hug. He was shocked at first, but relaxed into said hug after a minute.  
**HA!** **_GAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!_ ** **_  
_ ** _Shut up, Chara._

**{Geno’s POV}**

Geno returned to his apartment after a delicious pancake breakfast. He had made a mental note to make things that were made better by syrup more often, and was now ready for a long day of sleeping because sleep was important, and he had nothing to do because he was taking the day off because of the events that definitely hadn’t gone down at work yesterday.  
God damn it, Reaper was hot.  
Geno already missed his totally-not-boyfriend, and it had only been a few minutes since he’d gotten back. At least he’d shared a pancake breakfast with Reaper.  
The moment Geno’s couch came into view, the skeleton rushed towards it, 'belly' flopping on its incredible softness. _My god, yes._  
He rolled onto his back and his eyesockets were about half a millimeter from being shut when someone knocked on the door.  
_Of course,_ Geno sighed, getting up off of his precious couch to answer the door.  
“Who the hell could it be?”  
Probably some random stranger selling baked goods, or some people from the church trying to get him to convert to their religion. There was also the possibility of cops asking about those two mysterious disappearances, but…  
Geno hesitated to open the door once he reached it. It could be literally anyone, but he opened the door without any regard for who it could be.  
“Geno! Bro! It’s been so long!”  
No way. There was no way that this was actually happening.  
But it was.  
Fresh, Geno’s brother who he hadn’t seen for YEARS, was standing directly in front of him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maxi: I TOLD YOU NOT TO WRITE TODAY!  
> Well, I was suffering from MILD burnout on Thursday and I was busy all day yesterday!  
> Willow: BUSY SLEEPING YOUR ASS OFF!  
> Bob: Maxils was actually trying to get shit done on Thursday, but got distracted by her friend wanting to do a CYOA-type thing in real life, so she got pretty much nothing done on the bus. On Friday, she had all day to do it, but just couldn't break through her ADHD to find the motivation to work all day. Also, she had to go see her father doing choir things yesterday.  
> Thank you, Bob. Anyways, yes, Geno, Error and Fresh are brothers in this. Inspiration from Momma CQ. It's pretty damn obvious what Fresh and Ink have in common, if you know the lore behind both characters, by the way.  
> Willow: THEY BOTH-  
> Shut up, Cat. No spoiling.  
> Willow: YOU PUT IT IN THE TAGS, GOD DAMN IT!  
> Irrelevant.  
> Maxi: You said that you would take Saturdays off.  
> That was BEFORE I did two chapters in one day and had to catch up after not posting any chapters for two days. Anyways, the whole Papyrus question is still open.  
> Maxi: Geno and Reaper so obviously like each other. Have they dated yet?  
> Not in this story, yet. Maybe soon, though...  
> Bob: I thought this was supposed to be primarily CherryBerry.  
> It is... sorta. It's ONE of the main focuses.  
> Willow: You should do a short story on how Nightmare supposedly died in the fire, or got corrupted!  
> No.  
> Maxi: You should do one for how Error knows Nightmare!  
> No.  
> Bob: You should do one for the clearly implied fight between Error, Fresh and Geno.  
> No.  
> All: WHY NOT?!  
> Because two of the three will be covered in-story... possibly all of them.  
> Willow: You know what you SHOULD do? Illusion's backstory.  
> Good idea, might cover that in the story once we actually get enough shit on Illusion.  
> Maxi: Illusion should have a crush on Fresh!  
> Hm... It would be one-sided...  
> Bob: As one-sided as Errink?  
> Shut up, Bob.  
> Anyways, next chapter will have CherryBerry.  
> All: YAY!  
> Also, Ink is not dead. He just didn't sleep. And yes, Dream's POV takes place during the timeskip in Fresh's POV last time.  
> damn this chapter took a long time
> 
> Next chapter, a cashier suspects that a dank memer knows more than he lets on! A fast food worker makes a deal with a good Christian pureboi! A criminal mastermind tries to keep the two new memers from going out of line! A police investigates two missing person reports! A writer is forced into a social situation and struggles to keep the ghost fused with his SOUL from making him seem weird! SPOILER: He fails.
> 
> DRAMA ACTION POSSIBLE BLOODSHED!!!!!  
> Willow: Probable, at this point.


	7. in which Geno hasn't seen Fresh in 5 years and 364 days, Edge and Blue make a deal, Nightmare gets mildly pissed off, Black tries to play detective and Cross tells Dream about Chara

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In other news, Geno gets 2 POVs in a row, Illusion acts like a kindergartner, another person has gone missing, and Chara has a chocolate obsession.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Extra news: Lots of Dialogue in Cross's part. Gotta get that word count up, you know!

**{Geno’s POV}**

“Fresh?!” Geno gasped. How many years had it been since they’d seen each other, again?   
“Yo, bro! S’been a while!” Fresh answered. After all these years,  _ he still hadn’t dropped the slang. _   
“Where the fuck did you vanish to?” Geno demanded. He wanted answers out of his brother, and he wanted them now.   
“After the fight you an’ Error got into, I thought it’d be best to let my bros chill out for a while.”   
“And  _ a while _ meant  _ years? _ ”   
Fresh pulled down his sunglasses (that had changed from YO LO to BR UH) so his eyelights were visible. “Bro, both of ya moved before I could get back to ya.”   
_ Crap. _ Fresh had a point. Geno and Error had wanted to get as far away from each other as possible. Wait. Did that mean that Fresh was still living in their old house?   
“How did you find me?” Geno asked suspiciously.   
“Guess ya could say that I had a bit o’ help from a radical bromigo of mine.”   
Someone had ratted out Geno’s location to Fresh? But who…   
_ Maybe it was that guy I bumped into yesterday? _   
“Who?”   
“Said his name’s Ink. He lives in this rad building.”   
_ This only further proves my theory. _ “Sooo, what have you been doing since… how long has it been?”   
“Six years ago, bro. It’s been six years.”   
“It’s been WHAT?!” Geno screamed in shock. Six years?! How had he not seen Fresh OR Error for SIX FUCKING YEARS (minus yesterday)?!   
“Yeah, bro. Mind if I chill with ya for a bit? Maybe catch up over some tea?”   
“Come… Come in…” Geno was busy trying to wrap his skull around the fact that he hadn’t seen his brothers for six years. He hadn’t even SPOKEN to them.   
“Also, six years isn’t quite on the dot, if ya catch my drift. It’s been more like five years and three hundred sixty-four days, bro,” Fresh added as he walked past Geno. His brother jumped onto the couch, and Geno winced a bit. That couch was pretty old, so it could break easily. “So, tell me ‘bout yer life.”   
“It’s boring, really. I’m just a cashier at the local convenience store.”   
“Ya got a girlfriend or somethin’ that yer hidin’ from me?”   
“Well… it’s… complicated.” Yes, it was. Geno and Reaper were not officially in a relationship.   
“Ya got a  _ boy _ friend?”   
“Well… not exactly.”   
“How can one ‘not exactly’ have a boy-slash-girlfriend?”   
“How can one go five years and three hundred sixty-four days without seeing EITHER of his brothers?”   
That seemed to be enough to deter Fresh from the topic. “So… tell me about what you did,” Geno suggested.   
That provided a long conversation of avoiding the topics of Error and Reaper.

**{Edge’s POV}**

Edge decided to pass by Blue’s house. After all, he hadn’t asked for anything in return for the fast travel yet.   
_ Could just teleport inside… _   
Blue’d probably give him shit for that, though. Also, it’d probably be classified as breaking and entering.   
Edge settled on knocking, and the door opened to reveal that damn adorable face.   
“Oh! Hello, Edge!” Blue greeted him. Edge wondered for a moment if he’d even told Blue his name… It was either him or Classic.   
“Hey, Blue. You owe me.”   
Blue’s expression soured. “If I rememer correctly, the deal was that I told you my address and held your left hand, and you would teleport me home.”   
Damn. Blue was right. Fortunately, Edge was so smart and so slick, he thought up an excuse, and he thought it up quick. “Those were necessary for me to teleport you, tho! I didn’t hafta bring ya home.”   
The lie fooled Blue. “Oh. I guess you’re right. So, what do I owe you?”   
Edge hadn’t thought this far in advance. “Uh… um… one…”  _ No, a kiss would be too obvious… _ “One sinful thing.”   
“No,” Blue answered. “I won’t go against my principles just to fulfill a deal.”   
Edge needed to think up some extra motivation.  _ I didn’t want to do this, but… _ “How about this: You do one sinful thing, and I stay in your church for thirty minutes and read the bible.” Just the thought of reading that wretched book made Edge want to gag. That was when he thought up something else. “Each sinful thing after that will put me in there for another twenty-five minutes.”   
“Hm…” Blue seemed to be in deep thought. “Only if I get to choose what we do.”   
“Deal.” Edge held out his left hand, and Blue shook it. The deal had been made; there was no going back now.

**{Nightmare’s POV}**

“Would you PLEASE stop making out?!” Dust groaned at the two new recruits, who Nightmare had learned the names of now: Lust and Horror.  
“Well, _excuuuuse_ ME, _Karen!_ ” Horror spat back.  
“Yeah, it’s REALLY annoying,” Killer sighed, refusing to look up from the Game Boy one of the hostages had.  
“Piss off, _boomer,_ ” Lust growled… ‘menacingly.’ That growl would need some work.  
Nightmare was getting tired of all of this complaining. At least Illusion was staying quiet. _Sometimes, I miss how things used to be… before these idiots and that_ traitor _joined me._ At least the traitor hadn’t complained like this… until someone he cared about was targeted.  
Once everything went to screaming, Nightmare screeched, “YOU’D ALL _FUCKING_ BETTER SHUT THE _FUCK_ UP BEFORE I _FUCKING_ SNAP _ALL_ OF YOUR _FUCKING_ _NECKS!!!”_  
That did the trick VERY well, because everyone went back into silence.  
“God! Illusion, who usually annoys us all to NO END, is BETTER than ALL of you right now.”  
Illusion raised his hand like a kindergartner at the remark. To be fair, Nightmare had just scared the shit out of everyone in the alley.  
“Go ahead…”  
“Do you really mean that?” Illusion gasped excitedly.  
Nightmare let out a low growl. “Yes, I do.”  
“YEAH!” Illusion cheered. “TAKE THAT, FUCKERS!”  
“Aaaaand he’s annoying again.”  
As Illusion continued to brag about how he was ‘better’ than the other four, Nightmare wondered why he ever even _considered_ partnering with these retards.  
“You considered it because Dust and Killer are trained assassins, and I can create distractions,” Illusion answered. “I don’t know why you accepted my proposition to have Horror and Lust join us.”  
_JESUS FUCK-_ “Since when could you read minds?”  
“I can’t. You just muttered all of that out loud.”  
As childish and immature as Illusion was, and as stupid as he acted, Nightmare had to admit that the guy had at least _some_ metaphorical brains. For example, the whole face-changing thing had been entirely Illusion’s idea. He wasn’t exactly the brightest bulb in the world, but he made a half-decent brains of the group… sometimes.  
“Boss,” Killer groaned, “Horror and Lust just threatened to fuck each other…”  
“So?”  
“Out in the open.”  
“And this is my problem… _how?_ ”  
“...I guess it’s not… Imma find some more hostages.” Killer walked away.  
_I’m surrounded by idiots… Killer will never get a hostage by himself. Would be funny to see him try, though._  
Nightmare went back to thinking up more threats that would work on those idiots, like he had been _trying_ to do.

**{Black’s POV}**

“Hm… the only traces of evidence in both crime scenes are a mysterious black goop and two sets of footprints…” Black noted. Whoever - or  _ what _ ever - had caused the disappearances was definitely sloppy about it…   
_ Or covered in a black, sludge-like substance. _   
He rememered the group of three he had seen last night. One of them, the tentacle monster, had a sludge covering him. Maybe he was the culprit… Then again, those three were nowhere near where either crime had taken place… It was also definitely more than three hours from where they’d met to even the closer crime scene.   
_ There was no sludge on the path that they were walking along, though… not even while they were walking... _   
This was starting to get really confusing. This fact both made Black ecstatic and furious.   
“So… no witnesses… minimal evidence… I might have to start asking around to get more information on those weirdos.”   
As soon as he finished the sentence, he heard someone call his name. “Officer Black!”   
“What, can’t you see that I’m busy trying to deduce this case?”   
“That’s what I wanted to talk about,” his coworker called through the locked door. “There’s just been another missing person report-”   
“The fuck?!”   
“I know! We should check it out.”   
“Fine. Give me five minutes to get ready, and I’ll meet you at the car.”   
“Got it!”   
_ This 24-hour period just keeps getting better and better… _

**{Cross’s POV}**

“The hell’s going on here?” Cross muttered to himself. There was a small crowd standing in a semicircle shape.  
**“I’m going to headcanon it as free ice cream!”**  
“Who knows?” Dream answered. Cross had eventually managed to calm his therapist down.  
**“Kind of ironic, if you ask me.”** **  
**_Shut up, Chara._ Cross couldn’t see beyond the crowd, but he could definitely hear.  
“Everyone, calm down,” a voice from beyond the crowd announced. “We have our best officers on the case.”  
“Then how haven’t they cracked this case yet?!” someone called from the front.  
“These things take time, retard!” another person yelled.  
**“Do you think this has something to do with that Nightmare guy Dream was talking about?”** Chara asked excitedly. Cross glared at them, just in time to see them make a face of horror. **“What if it’s free chocolate?! You’ll never make it through!”**  
_You and your damn chocolate obsession. Hey, maybe_ you _should get therapy._ _  
_**“SHUT UP!”**  
“Three people have gone missing within the span of 24 hours and you can’t do anything to solve it?!”  
“Well, we don’t think it was the same person - or people - who caused this and the first two.”  
“Why?!”  
“Well, there’s no black goop, and the footprints are different.”  
The noise was starting to hurt Cross’s nonexistent ears.  
**“I agree. Let’s blow this joint.”**  
“Shut up, Chara…”  
“Did you say something?” Dream asked from beside Cross.  
“N-no!”  
**_I, frankly, rememer you telling me to shut up. Out loud._**  
_I can hear your thoughts, Chara._ He decided not to mention that. “The… the noise is just starting to get to me.”  
“Honestly, same here,” Dream groaned.  
**“You should kiss again! Maybe that will help you feel better!”**  
“Chara, could you NOT be yourself… FOR _FIVE MINUTES?!?!?!”_ _Crap._  
Dream was staring at Cross like he was insane.  
**“Busted!”**  
“I… I should… probably explain.”  
“You know what?” Dream yelled in response. “The explanations can wait until these people are gone.”  
“Or, we can just leave.”  
“Good idea. You can tell me what you’ve been hiding from me sooner that way.”  
Welp. Now he was gonna have to tell Dream about Chara.

~timeskip brought to you by dream and cross yeeting themselves out of a social situation and a shrek reference~

“So… tell me, who is this ‘Chara’ that you were speaking to?” Dream asked once they were out of the crowd.   
Cross hesitated for a moment. Chara, the ONE THING he told NOBODY about, NOT EVEN DREAM, was about to be revealed.   
“Well… I’ve never told anyone about this, but... Chara’s SOUL is  _ sorta  _ fused with mine.”   
They stared at each other while walking for a good thirty seconds before Dream answered, “Tell me more.”   
“Chara’s soul is human.”   
Another bout of silence, this time accompanied with stopping.   
**“He needs no more.”**   
_ Shut up, Chara. _ “Chara follows me around as this ghost-type thingy. I’m the only one who can see them, and Chara and I can read each other’s thoughts, considering that our SOULs are fused. The most important part though?”   
“Go on.”   
**“DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE-”**   
“Chara is a HUGE asshole.”   
**“FUCK YOU!”**   
“So… you have the SOUL of an asshole ghost that only you can see fused with your own SOUL… and you have NEVER told a SINGLE person about it?”   
“Not one. Somehow, you’re the first person to find out.”   
“And… how long has their SOUL been fused with yours?”   
Cross shrugged. “A long time. I can hardly rememer life without their constant screeching.”   
**“You piece of shit!”**   
“So, you probably think I’m insane or something…”   
“Well, now I know why it sometimes takes you a whole thirty seconds to answer my questions,” Dream replied. “Also, no, I don’t think you’re insane. I believe you.”   
“Y-you do?!” That was one of the things that Cross was most worried about.   
“Yeah.”   
**“The dude also thinks you’re, like, SUPER hot.”** _  
_ _ WILL YOU SHUT UP?! _   
“I think it would be kind of interesting,” Dream added, “to always have someone to talk to… even if they  _ are _ an asshole.”   
Dream and Cross both snickered at the remark while Chara screeched. Finally, Cross had let his secret slip to Dream… and he had never felt better about anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maxi: I thought you said that you weren't going to do this on Saturdays.  
> Well, that was before-  
> Willow: You used that excuse already.  
> Shut up, Cat. My story, my rules.  
> ANYWAYS! More people seem to be going missing. Does that mean that Killer succeeded?  
> Willow: Yes. Yes, it does.  
> But why are they not KILLING the hostages?  
> Maxi: So you don't have to write a brutal scene that would be considered explicit.  
> Then why do I have plans to write the fire scene in detail?  
> Bob: Because that wouldn't count as explicit.  
> So, why are you questioning me if you already know the answers?  
> Willow: You're questioning US. What was your IQ again?  
> damn i could go for another cookie  
> Illusion is my child now. He is anti-pure and I love him and he is mine. Credit me if you want to use him, I'll probably put a picture of him on my DeviantArt soon.  
> Maxi: What IS your DeviantArt?  
> MaxiMaster666, duh.  
> Bob: And this is the first time you've mentioned it on Ao3?  
> Shut up, Bob.  
> Maxi: Sooooooo, when are Blue and Edge gonna kiss?  
> Eventually, Maxi...  
> Bob: Why is Dream so accepting of the fact that Cross is being followed around by a ghost?  
> UH. Because plot convenience. Also Dream thinks that Cross is hot.  
> Willow: When will Frillusion happen?  
> Frillusion?  
> Willow: FResh x ILLUSION.  
> Maxi: Funkin' Mirage.  
> Bob: MiRADge.  
> I like Maxi's idea best.  
> Maxi: To quote Illusion... YEAH! TAKE THAT, FUCKERS!  
> Willow: Illusion should be a Yandere.  
> Bob: YEAH!  
> Good idea.
> 
> Next chapter, an illusionist meets his senpai! A fast food worker rickrolls everyone! An injured fast food worker takes a good Christian pureboi out to have the most sinful time of his life! A therapist asks his crush out on a date (as if they weren't already on one)! A good Christian pureboi drinks alcohol with a definitely-not-cute fast food worker! Yep, not cute at all.
> 
> DRAMA ACTION POSSIBLE BLOODSHED!!!!  
> Bob: Why does the number of exclamation marks keep changing?


	8. in which Illusion decides to stalk his Senpai who Illusion doesn't know is his Senpai yet, Classic pisses everyone off, Edge and Blue buy candy, Dream confesses that he has a crush on Cross (TO Cross this time) and Blue and Edge get fucking wasted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In other news, Illusion hides in a bush, Sans gets asked about some criminals by a police officer, sooner or later Dream's gonna need a therapist, and Blue and Edge do NOT have sex. Just making that clear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Illusion: I will not disobey Nightmare and get sidetracked
> 
> Fresh: *exists*
> 
> Illusion: NOTICE ME SENPAIIIIII

**{Illusion’s POV}**

Illusion snuck around the town. Nightmare had asked him to do a bit of scouting. Scouting was fun. Having to walk halfway across the town to scout along Green Street, which was nowhere near their base? Not so much.  
Illusion could have sworn that everyone thought that he was weak. Sure, he had the lowest HP in the entire group, and sure, he wasn’t as cold-hearted and ruthless as the others, but he was still powerful!   
...Right?   
_Don’t worry yourself with what Killer and Dust think,_ the little voice in his skull told him. _You’re just as strong as them, if not stronger!_   
“You’re right, little voice,” Illusion responded. “Who cares what they think, as long as I have you?”   
The voice in his head was a lot nicer than any of the others in the group, and a lot less screamy. The voice praised him, told him jokes, made him happy…   
“Do you think any of the others have little voices in their heads?” he asked the voice.   
_Maybe, or maybe you’re the only one strong enough to have a little voice like me._   
The thought of him being the only one strong enough to have a voice made Illusion think that maybe the others were lonely. “Do you think Nightmare would have a little voice? He’s really strong!”   
_That could be possible._   
“I like that theory.”   
_Someone’s coming! Hide!_   
Illusion did as the voice told and hid in a bush. Out of the apartment across the street came a very colorful-looking skeleton.   
“Woah!!!” Illusion gasped.   
So many pretty colors! Illusion felt a strange feeling in his SOUL, kind of like a fluttering. It made him feel all warm and tingly inside, and gave him the strange urge to follow the colorful stranger.   
Illusion teleported behind the skeleton and poked him on the shoulder.   
“Eh?” the skeleton spoke.   
“Hi! I’m Illusion!” Illusion smiled.   
“Yo. M’name’s Fresh, brah. Anyways, I gotta blow this joint. See ya ‘round.”   
Fresh walked off quickly, and Illusion felt the urge to make sure Fresh got to wherever he was going safely.   
_You should!_   
“Okay, little voice! Let’s go!” Illusion quietly followed Fresh around, paying no attention to his other assignment.

**{Classic’s POV}**

At this point in the day, the restaurant was pretty packed. Sans decided that this was the perfect time to pull out his trombone.  
 _Ah, yes. Now is my opportunity to rickroll the entire place._   
He made sure to stay in the kitchen so nobody knew that it was him. Just as he was about to play the first note, though, the bell rang from up front.   
_Well, mother fuck._   
Sans put his trombone back in its case and teleported to the front. Standing across the counter was a short skeleton wearing sunglasses and a police uniform. “Hey there, officer, what can I get ya?”   
“Some information on the three main suspects of the missing person files would be good. And a burger.” The skeleton pulled down his sunglasses to reveal three scars across one of his eyesockets, which was strange because of the lack of crime around the town.   
“Ah. Which is the priority, though?” Sans asked.   
“Eh, food first, questions later.”   
“Got it.” Sans teleported back into the kitchen to prepare the meal.

~timeskip brought to you by a hungry cop and a delayed rickroll~

After Sans had brought the officer his food and the payment was received, he spoke, “So, I don’t personally know any of the suspects. However, my therapist is the brother of the hentai horror.” Sans thought for a moment in an attempt to rememer Dream’s supposed brother’s name. “Nightmare, I think the goop giant’s name was.”  
The officer smiled and nodded. “Yes, this is helpful… Can you tell me any more?”   
“Sorry, but no. It’s kind of a touchy subject for my therapist. If you want more info, here’s the dude’s creds.” He handed the cop Dream’s business card. “Now, before you go, lemme tell ya a _rib-tickler._ ”   
“Oh, god…”   
“Why did the skeleton stay home for prom night?”   
The cop just sighed and replied, “I don’t know.”   
“Because he had no BODY to go with!” Sans snorted. The cop didn’t seem to find the joke very _humerus,_ because he walked out without a word.   
“Huh. Tough crowd. Fortunately, I have a larger one right out here.”   
Sans went back into the kitchen to reassemble his trombone, and once that was done, he began to play.   
The collective groan from outside was just what Sans had been hoping for.

**{Edge’s POV}**

“So, what’s the first thing ya wanna do?” Edge asked Blue as they walked around.  
“Well…” Blue seemed to be in deep thought. Edge thought it was adorable. Blue was just this pure cinnamon roll whose biggest flaw was being a religious bastard. “Do you have any ideas?”   
_We could kiss, we could have sex…_ “Well, there’s always drinking.”   
“Drinking water isn’t a sin.”   
Wow. Had this dude never heard of alcohol before? “I mean drinking BEER.”   
“But…”   
“You know what? We should prolly save _that_ for later.” After another minute of walking, Blue seemed to be distracted by the local candy store. “We could buy a shitload of candy and get sugar high, if that’s what you’re thinkin’.”   
“Well…”   
“Rememer the deal?”   
“Okay. Let’s do it.”   
They entered the store and began to look for the most sugary substances possible. Gum, chocolate, lollipops… This place seemed to have everything! There was no way that Edge was going to be able to choose!   
Blue seemed to be having just as hard of a time deciding as Edge was. “Chocolate? Maybe Mike and Ike’s? Ooh, Reese’s! But…”   
“Clearly, I’m not the only one who can’t decide on what to buy,” Edge noted.   
Blue looked up at him. “Do you have a particular favorite?”   
“Well, mustard, but we prolly won’t find that here…”   
Blue looked at him like he was crazy. _Welp. Guess I really_ am _the only one in town who likes mustard._   
The cashier called from the counter, “Might I suggest our luxury chocolates?”   
“Ooh, luxury!” Edge snickered. “Probably expensive.”   
“Hm… I suppose…” Blue hummed to himself.   
“What’s the price?”   
“Seven dollars and ninety-nine cents per box.”   
Edge did some quick math in his head. “How much chocolate per box?”   
“A lot.”   
That was a good deal! “We’ll take ten.”   
“TEN?!” Blue gasped in horror.   
“I’ll pay if he carries.”   
Blue looked like he was going to faint as Edge handed a stack of ninety dollars to the cashier and got ten huge boxes of chocolate in return.   
“Why do I have to carry?!”   
“Injured hand, rememer?”   
“Oh.”   
“How about,” the cashier suggested, “I give you a few bags?”   
“Yes, good idea.”   
The cashier bagged the chocolates and gave them to Edge and Blue. The bags were extraordinarily heavy, and Edge felt like he would collapse.   
“Th-thanks, Blue,” he grunted as Blue took a couple of bags off of him.   
“No problem, Edge.”   
“I guess you could say...”   
“Say what?”   
“That a _weight has been lifted!_ ”   
Blue groaned at the pun as he left the store, Edge following close behind. This was going to be a fun not-date!

**{Dream’s POV}**

As Dream and Cross made their way to Cross’s place, Dream could hardly suppress the nagging feeling telling him to take Ink’s advice from last night.  
If Dream asked Cross out, everything would change between them.   
“Dream, are you okay?” Cross asked.   
Dream thought up an excuse. “Yeah. I’m fine. Still a bit shocked from learning about Chara, though.”   
Honestly? Having someone to talk to constantly _would_ be cool. It was essentially Dream’s job to talk to others, and he thrived on conversation. The fact that Cross had been keeping Chara a secret from everyone was a bit annoying, though.   
“And Chara is still calling me a piece of shit when they’re the one that makes my life difficult. I’ve become numb to their insults at this point, thank god.”   
The urge to confess to Cross kept pulling on Dream’s SOUL, but Dream nodded it off. “You’re not a piece of shit, though.”   
“You really think so?”   
“Yeah, and I’m not judging you for keeping Chara a secret from me.” _I’m also not judging you for being hot._   
“Thanks.”   
“Don’t mention it.”   
As they neared Cross’s place, the urge to ask Cross out kept growing stronger and stronger. Eventually, Dream could hardly stand it and blurted out, “Do you want to go on a date with me?!” He immediately covered his mouth with his hands out of embarrassment. _Dream, you stupid idiot! Why the hell did you think that-_ _  
_ “Uh… okay.”   
“God, I knew I shouldn’t have asked! I must sound like a moron and- Wait did you just say yes?!” Dream gasped.   
“Yeah… but wasn’t what we were just doing sort of like a date?”   
Holy shit, it was. Dream was internally freaking out.   
“Oh, we’re back at my place. How about I call you later and we can work out the finer details later?”   
“Uh, sure. T-talk to you later. Bye,” Dream waved as Cross left his side.   
It took him about thirty seconds to register the possibility that Cross actually might like him back.   
_Sooner or later,_ I’m _gonna need a therapist._

**{Blue’s POV}**

“So, we’re at the bar,” Edge informed Blue. “Guess I’m spendin’ fifty-five minutes in yer church tomorrow.”  
Blue hadn’t eaten any of the chocolates they’d bought earlier yet, but if he didn’t have a serious hangover, he would in the morning.   
Hesitantly, he approached the door.   
“Oh, come on, ya big wuss, before I teleport ya in.”   
Blue glared at Edge. “I can open a door, thank you very much!” He flung open the door, which almost hit him in the face, spooking him, but he carried on. As he walked towards the counter in the bar, he noticed multiple shady-looking people, some depressed ones and two skeletons in particular who were making out shirtless in one of the booths. He cringed at the two, as everything that they were doing was sinful.   
“Ugh… so… indecent.”   
“Eh, Lust n’ Horror do that all the time,” Edge shrugged.   
“WHAT THE SHHHHIT’RE YOU LOOKIN’ *hic* AT?!” the skeleton with a large, creepy hole in his head yelled.   
“Shut up, ya bastard!” Edge shot back. “Ignore ‘im, he’s drunk off his ass.”   
Blue nodded in response, sticking close to Edge. The amount of sin here was… unnerving, to say the least.  
“Yo, Waiter!” Edge called once he and Blue were sitting down at the counter. “Can I get a glass o’ beer?”   
“What do they have here?” Blue asked. He wanted to make sure that there was at least _something_ healthy.   
“Lotsa wine n’ beer. There’s also water, but you ain’t gettin’ that.”   
Oh. “Well, I guess… I’ll have what he’s having,” Blue added, pointing to Edge. The words coming out of his mouth were sickening, but he and Edge had made a deal.   
“Okay, two beers, comin’ up,” the waiter called.   
In an effort to distract himself from the grossness of the place, Blue attempted to start a conversation with Edge. “So… who were those two?”   
“The local stripper an’ his butcher boyfriend. They make out a lot. They try not to let anyone catch ‘em, but… let’s just say, what they’re doin’ right now? That ain’t the dirtiest shit they’ve done in public.”   
Well. Now, Blue regretted asking. “That… that’s just nasty.”   
Out of the corner of his eye, Blue spotted a glass of what he could only assume was beer sliding down the counter, followed by an identical looking drink. The two drinks landed directly in front of Blue and Edge.   
“Perfect shot!” Everyone in the bar either snickered or howled at the remark, and Blue couldn’t understand why as Edge chugged his beer down. _Ugh… so… gluttonous…_   
Reluctantly, he reached out to grab his own drink and took a sip of it. It tasted weird at first, but the taste eventually became more tolerable, though he hated to admit it.   
“Yo, waits! Another beer over here!” Edge called as Blue took another sip. “S’good, right?”   
“As much as I hate to admit it, this beer has a... mildly pleasant taste.”   
“So drink the rest of yer drink!”   
Blue did as instructed and finished the drink.   
“Hey, another drink for this guy!” Edge yelled to the waiter.

~timeskip brought to you by everyone being drunk off of their asses and my soon-to-be-shown attempt at describing drunkness when i have never been drunk before, aside from sleep-drunk and that doesn’t count~

About six glasses in each, Edge grabbed Blue by the shoulders and kissed him long and hard.  
“You s-s-sick fuck!” Blue yelled, slapping Edge after the kiss was over. “How fuc… fucking dare you stop!” He pulled Edge in for another kiss, this one being better than the last.   
“Hey… B-Blueberry,” Edge chuckled adorably, “how ‘bout we go sssstop by your place?”   
“OH FUCK YES.” Blue hugged Edge tightly and they teleported to Blue’s place, right into the bed.   
No, they did not have sex.   
Yes, both of them would wake up with a killer hangover.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maxi: Let's make a deal. You can write all afternoon on every weekday, all day on Saturday and Sunday, and write little bits during school hours.  
> Willow: That sounds fair.  
> Bob: Yes, I agree.  
> but... but...  
> Willow: No ADHDing your way out of this one!  
> Nuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu ;^;  
> Bob: Stop making that face.  
> Maxi: We both know that she won't until we let her do this instead of actual schoolwork-  
> Glad you agree with me, Maxi! *shakes Maxi's paw*  
> Willow: Damn it, Maxils...  
> Illusion?!: Hi guys!  
> Bob: ILLUSION?!  
> Back in the story with you, Illusion.  
> Illusion: Do I get a POV next chapter? OwO  
> Willow: No.  
> Shut up, Cat. Uh... sure. *has idea* I just had an idea!  
> Maxi: *whispers* Get him to.... *muffled whispering*  
> Exactly!  
> Maxi: Damn it, now I WANT you to write more.  
> Illusion: *whispers* I can whisper too!  
> Willow: Illusion, why do you sound like a mix of Scrap (The Murder Of Me) and Gir (Invader Zim)?  
> Illusion: Maxils headcanons me that way! All you readers at home can headcanon my voice however you want, though.  
> Bob: Yep. Creepy as Scrap, goofy as Gir, but with the grammar of Maxils.  
> I am the GODDESS of the grammar world!  
> Maxi: Let's just get to the POVs...  
> Back into the story now, Illusion.  
> Illusion: You don't want me to leave, though.  
> Willow: By the way, how did Dream get out of the unnamed fast food place when he was asleep?  
> Ink eventually noticed, duh.  
> Illusion: Ink? owo  
> Bob: Maybe having Illusion know these things and break the fourth wall would make the story interesting?  
> Okay, I'll ask the readers. Should Illusion know about the events of the past? Let me know in the comments!  
> Willow: US!  
> Me. You're just figments of my imagination when I mention you on here.  
> damn this is probably gonna be a long end notes
> 
> Next chapter, a 'good' Christian 'pureboi' suffers from a hangover! An illusionist gets the idea to kidnap his Senpai after aforementioned Senpai talks to a cashier that isn't his brother for more than 0.2 seconds! A writer calls his therapist to ask about date details! A fast food worker and a fast food worker have a casual conversation that turns not-so-casual! An artist, a therapist and a 'good' Christian 'pureboi' talk about recent events! Something bad will happen next chapter...
> 
> DRAMA ACTION  
> Willow: Probable  
> BLOODSHED!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!  
> Maxi: God damn it, Maxils...  
> SHUT UP, MAXI! YOU DON'T LOVE ME ANYWAYS!


	9. in which Blue wakes up with a hangover, Illusion is given an idea, Cross calls Dream about date details, Classic makes a lot of puns and Ink (correctly) accuses Dream of having asked Cross out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In other news, Blue doesn't let Edge watch him change into clean clothes, Chara is actually fucking HELPFUL for once, Lust agitates Edge a _biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit_ too much, and Dream ships Errink.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was up all night last night doing...  
> not this.  
> mostly watching GrayStillPlays and playing forager.  
> Alright, so today you're gonna read the most amazing Sancest fanfic ever...  
> IT'S TOWN OF SANSES!  
> More AU bullshit, dammit!

**{Blue’s POV}**

The headache that Blue woke up with was nothing short of painful. In fact, painful was probably an understatement. Everything hurt, from his skull to his conscience.   
He didn’t want to open his eyesockets, but he did so anyways. At first, everything was blurry, but after a minute, his vision cleared and he could see Edge sleeping in the same bed as him.   
It took him a few seconds to fully register this.   
“Wh-EDGE?!” Blue shot up in his bed, moving all the way to the opposite edge. “What are you doing here?! Ow, my skull…”   
Edge shifted slightly. “Mmm… Sh… shut up, damn alarm…” It was at that moment that Blue’s alarm went off, causing Edge to jump, just as Blue had done (and was doing again). “THE HELL?!”   
“‘The hell’ is right,” Blue groaned. He wasn’t normally one to swear, but Edge had just accurately described the entire situation in two words.   
“B-BLUE?! What’re ya doin’ in… my… WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOIN’ IN WHAT I THINK IS YOUR ROOM?!”   
Blue’s ‘ears’ hurt from the screaming. “One, yes, this is my room. Two, do you think  _ I _ rememer how we got here? Both of us got drunk.”   
“Well, at least our clothes are still on.”   
“OH. Good. Yes. That is. VERY good. Stupid headache...”   
Edge snickered obviously at the remark. A faint red came over his face, one that was almost cute. Okay, maybe definitely cute. “Welcome to the wonderful world of hangovers. I’d tell you to enjoy your stay, but that just isn’t possible.”   
“That’s going to be the last time I drink.” Blue struggled to rememer the deal they had made the previous day.   
“Well, I guess that the number of times ya sinned last night times twenty-five, plus five, is the number o’ minutes I’m readin’ yer Bible.”   
Oh, right. THAT was the deal. “Thanks for reminding me. Now, please leave while I change into something clean.”   
“Do I hafta?” Edge winked. Blue felt his face heat up.   
“YES.”   
“Damn. Fine.” Edge jumped off of the bed and left the bedroom.   
Blue changed out of his clothes from the previous day and put on clean ones. He’d make sure to get a bath after Edge left.   
While he had a guest, he might as well make breakfast tacos… if this stupid hangover ever went away.

**{Illusion’s POV}**

Illusion had been following Fresh around, but he had lost him. He hadn’t expected the rad skeleton to get up so early, but Illusion couldn’t help himself from following Fresh around all morning. In fact, he’d been up half the night thinking about Fresh. Another thing he hadn’t expected was for Fresh to get out of his field of view.   
_ There he is! _ the little voice informed him. Illusion turned his head to see Fresh entering the convenience store, so the illusionist followed Fresh in.   
Fresh seemed to be buying lots of random things, including a book.   
_ I think the title is ‘Programming for Beginners,’ _ the voice suggested.   
Later on, Fresh walked through the clothing aisle, stopping to look at scarves, specifically red ones. He didn’t take a red scarf, though, but one that had a pattern of sad-looking frogs.   
_ Why would he buy a frog scarf? _   
Illusion shrugged and continued following until Fresh reached the check-out. Illusion felt an angry-type feeling in his SOUL. Not exactly anger, though. More like that one feeling when someone got a better toy than you on Christmas.   
_ You’re either talking about jealousy or envy. _   
Yeah, it was one of those.   
_ We should probably buy something so we don’t seem weird. _   
Illusion nodded at the plan and went over to the DVD section. He fingered through the movies until he found one titled, ‘The Emoji Movie’.   
_ No. Not that one. Please, no. _   
“But it sounds interesting…”   
_ Trust me, Illusion, it’s not a good movie! You’ll regret buying it! Oh, hey, Shrek! Buy that one. Not the other one. _   
“What about both?”   
_ Buy Shrek! Buy Shrek! _   
“Fine…” Illusion put ‘The Emoji Movie’ back on the rack and picked up a DVD case labelled ‘Shrek’.  
He brought it over to the checkout and paid to the one cashier with a glitchy eye, red scarf and blue sweater who eyed him with suspicion before saying, “Have a nice day and shop here again soon.”   
At the same time, the voice suggested,  _ Hey, if you kidnap Fresh, you probably won’t feel jealous anymore! _   
“Good idea.” He walked out of the nonexistent line, ready to convey the voice’s idea to Nightmare.

**{Cross’s POV}**

Cross picked up the phone nervously and dialed Dream’s number.   
**_Calling your_ ** **boyfriend** **_about the date?_ **   
“Shut up, Chara.”   
**_It’s true now, though._ **   
“Two people are not in a romantic relationship unless both of them have actually agreed to be in one. I’ve only agreed to a date.”   
**_You want to be his boyfriend, though. Don’t deny it._ ** **  
** “So what?”   
**_You just accidentally pressed the call button._ **   
“Shit!” He quickly pulled the phone up to his ‘ear’. It took two rings for Dream to answer.   
“Hello?” Dream spoke.   
“Oh, hey, Dream!” Cross replied.   
“Oh, Cross! What a pleasant surprise!”   
“Yeah, I called to iron out the details of our date.”   
“O-oh, right! So, where do you want to go?”   
**_Into your bed with him._ **   
Cross could feel himself blushing at the remark. Fortunately, Dream wasn’t there to witness it.  _ Shut up, Chara. _ “Uh… how about we…”   
**_Buy a bunch of chocolate, go to a romantic hill, have your date there and feed me all the chocolate!_ **   
“Oh, hey, Chara was just helpful for once,” Cross answered. It felt good, being able to mention Chara in a conversation casually. “They suggested that we go to a hill and have our date there.”   
“What hill, though?”   
_ Hey, Chara, help me out here. _   
**_Repeat what I think: The one along Salem Road, with a great view of the river._ **   
“The one along Salem Road, with a great view of the river,” Cross repeated. This was new and unusual to him. Chara? Helpful? Those two words simply did not mix!   
“Oh, yeah! I’ve heard great things about that place,” Dream agreed. “Have a time in mind?”   
_ Chara? _   
**_How does 6:30 PM sound?_ ** _  
_ “How does 6:30 PM sound?”   
“Um, I have a therapy session with Classic today, at 5. I wouldn’t be able to make it there in time for 6:30. How about 7?”  
“Sure, that’s great. See you at 7.” Cross hung up the phone.   
**_You forgot about the chocolate, by the way._ **   
“Chara, you can’t even eat. You’re a ghost.”   
**_You can eat chocolate after the date, then. I can taste what you eat, rememer?_ **   
“Okay, fine. Also, thanks,” Cross thanked Chara. “I mean it, by the way.”   
**_Don’t expect it to last._ **   
“I don’t plan to.”   
With that, Cross left the phone to make breakfast. He had a long day of waiting and preparing ahead of him, and he didn’t want to waste any time.

**{Classic’s POV}**

Sans was resting in the kitchen. So far, nobody had come in, meaning that he hadn’t had to do any work, which, consequentially, meant that he could have a break until someone actually came. He had gotten lucky, and not just this morning.  
For the past couple of days, things hadn’t been too stressful at work. Sure, yesterday morning, everything had been a mess, but the rest of the day had been calm. After Edge had been taken to Sci (by Sans), everything had been generally calm.  
Of course, Sans wasn’t going to be _too_ optimistic about this. For all he knew, the place could be packed by noon and he’d snap under the stress, but for now, he was choosing to live in the present and think about what was good, as Dream had instructed.  
Sans reached for his bottle of ketchup, and just as his phalanges touched it, he heard someone open the door.  
_I’m gonna have a serious_ bone to pick _with whoever the fuck interrupted my nap…_ He peered out through the kitchen door. Making his eay to one of the seats was an exhausted looking Edge.  
“Oh, hey, Edge,” Sans called, preparing for a pun storm. “What’s _boning_ on? No offense, but ya look like shit. Ya catch a _femur_ or something? _Tibia_ honest, I don’t want to get sick. Why did you _mustard_ the _curry-_ ge to come here today? Did ya wanna _ketchup_ on recent events with me? I’d _relish_ the conversation. It’s been so _bonely_ without you here. Wait, did you stay up until three in the morning again? You should _nugget_ up so early when you do that. I’d be happy to _salad_ you some grub, _dough_ _._ ”  
Edge let out an exhausted snort. “I can tell by the _thyme_ and cleanliness of the place that I win _thirst_ _fries_ for comin’ the earliest, a _side of fries_ from you?”  
Sans laughed at the puns. “Yeah. You didn’t answer any of my questions, though.”  
“Let’s see… Well, I decided to come ‘ere, so that’s a start. No, I ain’t sick. Hangover.”  
“That would explain the first two questions.”  
“I wanted to come here cuz Blue’s tacos taste like shit-”  
“Blue?” Sans felt the sudden urge to pry into this. Clearly, he was going to.  
“Yep. We made a deal and got really drunk and I woke up at his place, AND NO, we did not have sex.”  
“He of all people should know not to deal with the devil.”  
“The bet was that for everything he did that was against his principles would earn 25 minutes in his damn church from me, plus 5 minutes."  
“What are you at right now?”  
Edge muttered some numbers under his breath, before answering, “At least three sins from ‘im.”  
“So, an hour and twenty minutes. Not bad!”  
“Actually, it’s more,” another voice called from the entrance. “You and ‘Blue’ had six drinks each…”  
“Annnnnd?” Sans asked. The way that the guy had ended his sentence made it seem like there was more.  
“Oh, fuck me…”  
“Yeah, Blue probably would,” the guy responded, causing Edge to go a _red_ iculous shade of red. Sans had to stifle a snicker as the stranger continued, “You and him were making out after six, and then you teleported out without paying.”  
Edge’s eyelights vanished, though the blush covering his face didn’t. “SHIT!!!”  
“So… what you owe him is more like…” The random stranger paused. “Three hours and… fifty minutes reading his book of religion. That’s just an estimate.”  
“Ooooh!” Sans gasped. There was no way that he was letting go of this! “Do ya also owe him that amount of time in bed?”  
“SHUT UP, ASSHOLE! You too, Lust!”  
“And you called him Blueberry.”  
Sans didn’t think that Edge would have been able to go any darker of a red shade, but he did. “If any of you speak of this to ANYONE, you can kiss your lives goodbye!”  
Sans quickly nodded in compliance. As depressed as he was, he actually _wanted_ to get better before dying. Lust just shrugged.  
“Okay, boomer.”  
Edge’s eye glowed fiercely at the remark. “LUST… Do you think that Horror would miss you if you went missing?”  
“Fuck yeah. That’s one of the reasons we’re in a relationship.”  
Sans backed away slowly as Edge threatened Lust. One of the two was about to get dunked on REALLY hard, and Sans had a feeling that he knew which would receive the bad time. In order to dodge any and all bullets, Sans teleported into the kitchen.

~timeskip brought to you by edge calling blue blueberry and lust calling edge boomer~

When the sounds of attacks firing stopped, Sans peeked through the door. The place was a mess… an OPEN mess. In an effort not to waste any time, Sans teleported to the neon ‘Open’ sign and shut it off.   
This… would take a while to clean up.   
It would also take Sans a while to forget what Edge had said.

**{Ink’s POV}**

Ink, Dream and Blue all sat in silence. It was like a ritual of theirs, meeting up at Inks’s on Tuesday mornings to discuss the events of the previous week. However, Ink noticed that this meet-up was… unusually quiet. Normally, either Blue or Dream would have spilled everything they did, saw and heard in the past week, but neither of them had spoken a word outside of greetings.   
Ink took this opportunity to speak. Looking at his scarf to read his notes from the week, he began, “So, I met this guy named Error.” Blue gave him a glare of suspicion, but it only lasted about half a second. “I literally ran into him while buying more paint because I had forgotten to buy some earlier. He seems like a nice guy.” He checked his scarf again. “On the same day, earlier, though, I met a dude named Fresh.”   
“Oh, Fresh? I know him!” Dream piped up.   
“Same,” Blue added.   
“He can get really annoying at times, especially when he ends up making you late for your activities.”   
“That almost happened to me,” Blue sighed. “He tried to engage in a conversation after you took me to that grease trap you call a restaurant.”   
This was more like it, even though they were painting Fresh as really annoying. Ink didn’t mind him, honestly.   
“For the last time, I’m sorry, Blue!” Dream sighed. “Oh, but did you hear? Classic is the only one currently working, because Edge burnt one of his hands. I heard that the burn was pretty bad.”   
“Y-yeah, I heard,” Blue nodded, avoiding eye contact. A shade of light blue, so pale that Ink could hardly tell, appeared on Blue’s face. “It’s rather unfortunate.”   
“I’m willing to bet that Classic is going to mention working alone in his next therapy session.”   
“Sooo, what did you guys  _ do _ over the past week?” Ink brought up. That instantly silenced them again. Ink could tell now that they were hiding something, either from each other or from him.   
“Nothing much, aside from what has already been mentioned,” Dream spoke after what felt like an hour. “Cross did well during his therapy session.”   
“Same here. Church was the same as it always is,” Blue added.   
“Oh, come on. You have to have done more than just  _ that, _ ” Ink replied. Both of them went silent again. Ink checked his scarf again and noticed the line that read, ‘Told Dream to ask out Cross’. Directly under it read, ‘REMEMBER: No Homo = Christian principle’, so Ink decided to go with the lines below those. “So, Dream, are you feeling okay after yesterday?”   
“What happened yesterday?” Blue asked.   
“I… I don’t wanna talk about that,” Dream replied.   
Ink, completely forgetting about the one line written on his scarf, added, “And did you take my advice?”   
“What advice?”   
“You never gave me advice,” Dream answered suspiciously.   
“Okay, now I  _ know _ you’ve been hiding something from me.” Ink narrowed his eyesockets. “In fact,  _ both _ of you seem to be hiding things. I’m not an idiot, you know. Forgetful? That’s my middle name. Stupid? Not at all.”   
Blue’s eyelights were shifting nervously. Dream remained a steady gaze, but Ink could see that he was tensing up.   
“So, you are.”   
“Not from you, Ink,” Dream sighed.   
“So, you DID ask Cross out?”   
“What?!” Blue yelled.   
Ink caught a glimpse of that one line on his scarf. “Oh. Right.” Dream was gonna give him shit about this later.   
Dream, glaring at Ink, responded, “Only if you asked out Error.” He gave a smug smirk.   
“Why would I do that?” Ink denied.   
“I NEED A MOMENT,” Blue interrupted, his tone sounding more nervous than pissed, standing up. His eyesockets were completely dark, which was rare for him. The short skeleton stormed out of the room. And Dream and Ink glanced at each other.   
“I’m in  _ deeeeeeep _ shit, aren’t I?” Ink asked.   
“The deepest,” Dream replied, following Blue out of the room.   
Ink heard a door open and slam shut, with two sets of footsteps in between. Ink had just  _ seriously _ fucked up with his two best friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maxi: How about this. You can work on the chapters if you do your schoolwork in between, and you can post every other day.  
> *lists pros and cons* Okay, fine. If I finish two chapters in two days, though, I post two chapters in two days. Also, breaks are exempt from this rule and I can write as much as I want over winter break, spring break, summer break, fall break and exam break.  
> Willow: You're studying for your learner's permit this winter break, and you need to study for your exams during exam break. You have PATs this year, you know.  
> Bob: Also, Classic has basically turned into GrayStillPlays.  
> More being a dick to Edge, dammit! Anyways, okay, fine, Cat. I'll keep my normal schedule during exam break, but not winter.  
> Maxi: GrayStillPlays?  
> Willow: YouTuber that Maxils watches. I think that part of her sadistic tendencies come from watching channels like his.  
> We're getting off topic, you know, right, Cat?  
> Anyways, Dream is gonna be pissed at Ink for a while... at least until he hears what Blue did.  
> Bob: Next chapter.  
> Illusion: Do I get another POV next chapter?  
> No, but you get heavily featured in Nightmare's. In fact, you'll get to kidnap Fresh soon!  
> Illusion: Okay.  
> Maxi: How the fuck did that work?  
> Willow: Make a short story, dammit! Make a SET of short stories!  
> The whole fire thing will actually be covered in Nightmare's POV next chapter.  
> Illusion: You should write Flans!  
> Flowey is not in the story-  
> Illusion: Not Flans, FLANS!!!  
> Willow: Which is...?  
> *looks up* Sans x Floor.  
> Maxi: Why not Sans x Ketchup?  
> Or Sans x Floor x Ketchup?  
> Bob: Sans x Floor x Ketchup x Depression!  
> Willow: No, all of those suggestions are bad. We're not doing any of them.  
> All except Willow: Aww, why not?  
> Willow: Because Kustard.  
> No, this story is NOT a Kustard fanfic.  
> Willow: Not even a little?  
> No.  
> Maxi: You should write a short story on why Sans is depressed in the first place.  
> Bob: Or how Geno and Reaper met!  
> Willow: Or the fight between Error and Geno!  
> Illusion: Or why Fresh was looking at the scarves and books!  
> *thinks: Crap, that's actually a good idea... In fact, two of those are...* How about we ask the readers?  
> Illusion: You already asked about whether I should keep doing this.  
> Willow: And if you should include some Papyruses.  
> Shut up, Cat. I've received no response on that one, so I'm gonna close it and say no. Also, Cat, your suggestion will exist next chapter, too. So, should we do bonus scenes? Let me know in a comment!
> 
> Next chapter, a therapist tries to explain what happened between him and his client to a 'good' Christian 'pureboi'! A cashier goes to see his graveyard not-boyfriend! A programmer reflects on how it's been 6 years since he last saw his brothers! A criminal mastermind has a nightmare! A dank memer has Feeling of being watched! That chapter ain't gonna end well...
> 
> DRAMA ACTION PROBABLE BLOODSHED!!!  
> Maxi: She changed it to what Willow did...  
> SHUT UP, MAXI! YOU DON'T LOVE ME ANYWAYS!


	10. in which Dream makes a pinky promise, Geno tells Reaper about the fight, Error asks Ink out on what definitely isn't a date, Nightmare watches Shrek and Fresh eats instant noodles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In other news, Blue is gay for Edge, Nightmare reveals what happened in the fire, Error still gives a shit about Geno, and Fresh has a fake plant that only looks like pot. I am the creator, I can confirm this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternate chapter title: Everyone in this story who has a brother in-story gets a POV  
> Thanks for 300 hits!

**{Dream’s POV}**

Dream sat down outside of the apartment next to Blue. “Listen, I can explain-”   
“Ink was right, you know,” Blue sighed. “About the whole hiding things ordeal.”   
“What do you mean?” Dream asked, sitting down next to Blue.   
“I’ll tell if you tell me about you and Cross.”   
“Well, we’re not officially romantic partners.”  _ Yet. _ Dream decided to leave that last word out. “It was Ink’s idea for me to ask him out, and lo and behold, it actually worked. I have a date with him tonight at seven.” He avoided the topic of Nightmare’s return. “So, what were you hiding?”   
“You really want to know?”   
Dream nodded. “Don’t worry, I pinky swear not to tell.” Dream held up his pinky, and Blue intertwined Dream’s pinky with his own.   
“Yesterday, Edge approached me to make a deal. For every sinful thing I did, he’d spend twenty-five minutes in the church.”   
“And you agreed to that deal?”   
Blue turned away in embarrassment. “Yes, I did. One thing I did was drink with him.”   
Dream’s eyesockets widened in shock. Blue and alcohol were two things he never thought could be combined. Ink, maybe. Himself? Only if it was REALLY bad. Blue, though?   
“Apparently, we teleported to my place at one point… into my bed.”   
Dream stifled a laugh. Had Blue done the thing with Edge?   
“I know what you’re thinking. No, we did not do the thing. Still, though…” Tears began to well up in Blue’s eyesockets.   
“You kind of wish you  _ had _ done the thing?”   
Blue nodded, and the tears began streaming down his face. “And now I’m gonna go to Hell because I sinned so much and I think he’s cute and I didn’t check in with the Minecraft server and I probably committed all seven sins last night but I was drunk so I can’t rememer and you probably hate me for it and-”   
“Blue, calm down,” Dream stopped him, hugging him. “You’re not going to go to Hell.”  _ Ink probably is, though. _   
“I should, though!”   
“No, you acted on impulse. Everybody does it. I’ve done so… more than once.” Two images came to mind: asking out Cross and the fire that Dream thought had killed Nightmare. “Ink’s done it, too.”  _ A lot. _   
“But… but…”   
“Thinking that Edge is cute isn’t gonna send you down there, either.” That anti-gay part of the Bible was honestly pretty stupid. “You wanna know something?”   
“O-Okay.”   
“I think Cross is hot as all hell.”   
“Dream! You shouldn’t swear!”   
“Just saying, you’re not the only gay person here. I can relate.”   
“Heh… thanks, Dream,” Blue replied, wiping a tear from his eyesocket.   
“Don’t mention it. It’s my job to help people feel better, rememer?” he chuckled, and Blue chuckled with him.   
“Should we go back in and talk to Ink?”   
“Nah, I’m still pretty mad at him,” Dream glared. Less mad now, but still pretty pissed. “A while to cool down is all I should need. I’ll talk to him in a day or two.”  
“You’d better.”   
“Don’t worry, I won’t forget.” Dream and Blue stood up together and walked out of the building.  _ Yeah. I’ll talk to him tomorrow. _

**{Geno’s POV}**

Geno made his way to the graveyard. It had been six years since he’d last spoken to Error. He was actually kind of proud of this achievement, but it also made him kind of sad.   
There was no way in hell that he’d ever forgive Error. That just wasn’t happening. However, deep down, he still cared, even if it was just a bit, even though Error probably wanted nothing to do with Geno.   
He really needed to talk to someone, particularly Reaper.   
“Hey, Geno~” Right on cue.   
Geno turned around and jumped. He had definitely not expected Reaper to be  _ this _ close. “HOLY CRAP.”   
“Bet you weren’t expecting me, huh?~”   
“Actually, I was.” Reaper’s beautiful smile dropped. “I just… didn’t expect you to appear so close to me.” There was that glorious smile that made Reaper look like a billion dollars again.   
“You know, my shift has been over for hours.”   
“Yeah, so? What’s wrong with me wanting to come and see you?”   
“You never come this early unless something is wrong,” Reaper answered grimly. “Is something bothering you? Is some _ one _ bothering you? Cuz you know what I’d do if that were the case.”   
Geno paused for a moment, before replying, “There’s nothing you can do about it.”  _ Nothing that I want you to do, anyways. _   
“Are you completely sure about that?”   
“Yeah.”   
“Well, at least tell me what’s bugging you.”   
“Well, you see…”

~timeskip brought to you by reaper being a spoopy son of a bitch and geno being a sad boi~

“...and that’s pretty much how it went down,” Geno finished with a sigh.   
“And this all happened six years ago today?”   
Geno nodded sadly. “Yep.”   
“Well, I think I know a way to make you happy again.” Reaper put his hands on Geno’s shoulders and pulled him close. “But first, you have to close your eyesockets until I tell you to.”   
Geno did so and almost instantly, something pressed against his mouth. He struggled to keep his eyesockets closed out of shock, but eventually relaxed. He found himself returning what he assumed to be a kiss, and it dragged on for what felt like an hour. Eventually, the feeling stopped.   
“You can open them now.” Geno blinked open his eyesockets, still standing face to face with Reaper. “Wanna do it again?”   
He didn’t even have to ask.

**{Error’s POV}**

Six years.   
SIX. GOD. DAMN. YEARS.   
Today, it would be six years since Error last saw either Geno or Fresh.   
The thought was depressing. The fight had been bad, but somehow, it had been so bad that Error hadn’t seen either of his brothers for such a long time. Maybe he’d caught glimpses of them once or twice, but he hadn’t noticed if he did.   
If he could go back in time and change everything, he would. However, that was impossible. If he or Nightmare couldn’t do it, which neither one could, there was no way that anyone could be so powerful that they could rewrite history.   
Nightmare. Nightmare had probably wanted to change his past more than anyone. Error didn’t know how Nightmare became so corrupted, and Nightmare wasn’t willing to share, but the glitched skeleton knew that Nightmare had hated his life, so he took it out on others. Apparently, ‘others’ had included Geno, which was the whole reason the fight happened in the first place.  
It took a moment for Error to realize that he was crying. He willed himself to cease the flow of tears from his eyesockets and continued with his monologue.   
Error had managed to save his brother, even though the latter had been badly injured, but it had forced Error to reveal his affiliation with Nightmare, which in turn caused Geno to hate him. Error had wanted to hate Geno back, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do so. Chances were that Fresh hated him, too… then again, Fresh was emotionless. He couldn’t love Error, but probably also couldn’t hate him.   
Fortunately, Error had someone new to talk to, someone that didn’t know about his past, someone that he may or may not have had a slight crush on.   
_ It’s rude to intrude on others without giving them a warning, _ Geno had told him a long time ago, when they were still children. It popped up in his mind as if it was a warning. Error didn’t give a damn and teleported to where Ink’s apartment was.   
By sheer luck, he managed to teleport to just in front of Ink’s door. It was like the warning controlled his teleportation, and Error was forced to knock.   
He did so, reluctantly stopping himself from trying to open the door himself, and a muffled, “Come in, it’s unlocked,” sounded from the other side. Error opened the door to see Ink lying on a couch, staring listlessly at the ceiling.   
‘Hey, Ink,” Error greeted him.   
“Oh. Hey, Error,” Ink sighed. “What brings you here?”   
“Needed someone to chat with that isn’t annoying, stupid or judgmental.”   
“Well, you’ve come to the wrong place, because I’m probably the most stupid person in the world.” Ink turned to face the back of the couch.   
“Oh, come on,” Error chuckled, “what you did can’t be half as bad as some of the stupid shit I’ve-”   
“I’m pretty sure my two best friends hate me now.”   
“Oh.” Okay, maybe it was just as stupid. “I’m not gonna ask about how that happened, but that doesn’t mean that you’re stupid.”   
“Let’s see… there’s the shit memory, which is the whole reason they hate me… uh… SEE?! Shit memory. So bad, I can’t even rememer the other stupid shit I’ve done.”   
“How about we go out for some wine tonight? Nothing a drink or two can’t help,” Error suggested. He hoped that Ink wouldn’t see what he was trying to do.   
“Like a date?” Fuck.   
“N-no, just as friends.” Error couldn’t stop himself from stuttering at the accusation.   
Ink eyed him with suspicion before answering, “Okay, I’ll come with.”   
“Great!” Error replied. “Does seven work for you?”   
“Uh… yeah, I think. I’m probably forgetting about something, but I’ll call if that happens.”   
“Okay, cool.”   
“Why are you asking me to go with you on a not-date, though?”   
“I just… need someone to vent to. A lot of shit has happened in the past week.”   
“Okay, see you at seven?”   
“Seven, yeah. Bye.” Error backed out to breathe a sigh of relief. He’d done it. He’d asked Ink out, and there was no turning back.   
He just hoped that Ink would actually rememer.

**{Nightmare’s POV}**

_ An electrical cracking could be heard as the room went completely dark. The only sound that could be heard afterwards were echoes. The darkness was deafeningly thick, almost like ink. _ _  
_ _ “Nightmare!” someone called out. Panicking, the tentacled, goopy skeleton hid somewhere, knocking over an unseen object in the process. An orange light could be seen about five seconds after, and the light grew and grew until it revealed a raging fire. _ _  
_ _ “Nightmare! Get out of there!” one of the other skeletons in the building called as the fire continued to grow quickly. Nightmare attempted to escape, but a burning post fell in front of him, scorching him. _ _  
_ _ Coughs could be heard from the other skeletons. Nightmare could barely see them through the fire. “Dream! Don’t go in! It’s too dangerous!” the shortest coughed. _ _  
_ _ “Nightmare is my brother! I’m going in whether you like it or not” the medium one retaliated. Nightmare tried to respond, but the fire lashed at him again, the smoke it produced causing him to cough as well. _ _  
_ _ “We need to leave now,” the tallest pointed out. “The fire will spread through the building and probably collapse on us if we don’t.” _ _  
_ _ “No! I’m going in to save him!” Dream rushed towards the fire as Nightmare curled into a small ball to shield his face from further fire-related harm. _ _  
_ _ A large wooden beam broke off over Nightmare. He didn’t even have time to notice it before it fell onto him, pinning him under its burning wrath. _ _  
_ _ “NIGHTMARE!!!” _ _  
_ _ “Blue, get out! I’ll handle Dream!” _ _  
_ _ The sound of footsteps. _ _  
_ _ Screams of objection. _ _  
_ _ A single, repeated word. _ _  
_ _ “Nightmare!!!” _ _  
_ _ “Nightmare!!” _ _  
_ “Nightmare!”   
Nightmare shot up and looked over to his side to see Illusion bouncing up and down repeatedly.   
“Guess what!”   
“I was sleeping, you idiot!”   
“I found a candidate for our next target! His name’s Fresh-”   
“Fresh?” Fresh, as in the traitor’s brother Fresh? The same Fresh that spoke in that annoying slang?   
“Yeah! He likes scarves with sad frogs, and he wears clothes with lots of colors, and his awesome shades can change words, and I think he’s interested in learning how to program, and he’s super nice, and-”   
“I get it,” Nightmare groaned, plugging his ‘ears’. Illusion seemed to be pretty obsessed with Fresh, when Nightmare couldn’t figure out why ANYONE would be even REMOTELY interested in that nuisance. Then again, this was Illusion.   
“Anyways, can we capture him?”   
“Illusion. You want to prove your worth to me, right?”   
Illusion nodded quickly.   
“Do you think you could try capturing him yourself?”   
Illusion shook his head this time.   
“Well, I think you can.”   
“You do?”   
“Yes, because you’re ‘smart’, ‘powerful’ and a master distractor.” Only one of those was completely true. “You can do it.”   
“Oh, before I forget, I bought a movie for us to watch!”   
Nightmare facepalmed. Illusion might have just blown their cover!   
“It’s called Shrek.” Ooh, a good movie! Illusion had just redeemed himself.   
“Just put it on the couch,” he commanded. He would be genuinely impressed if Illusion actually managed to catch the rainbow radhole.   
After Illusion left, Nightmare called Horror, Dust and Killer over to the couch to watch Shrek, all of them smiling as the familiar “Somebody once told me” sounded.

~timeskip brought to you by 300 hits and smash mouth all star~

As the credits rolled, Nightmare looked around. He noticed that Illusion and Lust weren’t there. Illusion, he knew the reason for, but if Lust was getting into trouble…   
“Horror, where is your boyfriend?” he asked.   
Horror shrugged unknowingly. “Who knows.”   
“I think we should go look for him,” Dust suggested. “And by we, I mean Horror and Killer.”   
“Lust is Horror’s boyfriend,” Killer noted. “Therefore, just Horror should go.”   
“Okay,” Horror responded, getting up from the couch.   
“Well, that’s settled,” Nightmare muttered. “Wanna watch Shrek 2?”   
“Hell yeah!” Dust and Killer answered. It didn’t take long before the new movie was playing.

**{Fresh’s POV}**

Fresh had succeeded in his goal to find Geno, he’d done the thing he did every year on the anniversary of the fight (except this time, he’d bought a Pepe scarf) and was now resting on his couch. He deserved some time to relax and browse r/dankmemes on Reddit. Sometimes, some memes almost made him laugh.   
Often, Fresh  _ really _ wished that he could feel. Then again, he’d seen what caring had done to Geno and Error, and was almost glad that he couldn’t.   
There was a crash from around his front door.   
“The funk?” he questioned, going over to check it out. The table with what wasn’t a pot of pot and was a fake plant that RESEMBLED pot had been knocked over. Fortunately, the pot, ‘dirt’ and ‘plant’ were all made of plastic and hadn’t broken. Fresh put the table back up and the plant back on it.   
The moment he turned around, he felt like he was being watched which sent a weird shiver down his spine. That definitely wasn’t normal. He turned around and the feeling left briefly.   
_ Guess it’s just the wind. _ Yeah, that would explain it. Another possibility was that he was just tired. He turned off his phone (which he had left on) and went to make himself something to eat.   
The Feeling of being watched returned as he opened the fridge, but he shrugged it off. Inside of the fridge was the food he’d bought earlier (among other things) and some instant noodles that he’d already bought earlier. That had been the last thing in his fridge before he’d left. “Might s’well eat it now,” he muttered, pulling out the noodles from the fridge.   
He prepared his lunch and, once it was done, began eating. Various questions went through his head, like how the funk a skeleton could eat, why instant noodles didn’t actually cook instantly, whatever the hecc made someone design a Pepe scarf… the usual stuff.   
After about ten or fifteen minutes of fiddling with his new scarf while eating, he was done. About three seconds after he put his dish in the dishwasher, something hard hit him in the back of the skull, and he didn’t even have time to feel the pain before everything went black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Willow: One, is everyone in the town a Sans?  
> Yes. Only eighteen matter.  
> Maxi: And only sixteen have gotten POVs.  
> Only sixteen matter. Dust and Killer are there because Nightmare needs people to work for him. (May or may not have their POVs soon.)  
> Willow: Two, can everyone teleport?  
> Pretty much. Some prefer to get exercise (like Blue), while some just completely forget that they can (like Ink).  
> Willow: Three, if Blue can teleport, why did he need Edge to teleport him?  
> It may or may not just have been an excuse for him to hold Edge's hand. Also, he was tired.  
> Willow: Four, why does nobody have a car?  
> Because almost everybody can teleport.  
> Willow: Five, who CAN'T teleport?  
> Ink without Broomy.  
> Maxi: Six, can Black and Blue even teleport?  
> Yyyyyyyes. Final answer. That's what I'm going with.  
> Willow: Seven, did Fresh just fucking die?!  
> Illusion: No, I smacked him in the head with a baseball bat! ^w^  
> Great job, Illusion. You're amazing.  
> Maxi: Don't praise him for that!  
> He's evil!  
> Illusion: Yeah, I'm evil! ^w^  
> Bob: Illusion hardly fits the description of 'evil.'  
> Willow: He's, like, an anti-villain.  
> Shut up, Cat. Stop insulting my child.  
> Willow: *in russian accent* He is _our_ child. *ussr anthem plays*  
> Maxi: Why do I even deal with you all?  
> SHUT UP, MAXI! YOU DON'T LOVE ME ANYWAYS!  
> Illusion: Was Voicey right? Is The Emoji Movie a bad movie?  
> Everyone Else: IT'S SHIT. DON'T WATCH OR BUY IT, EVER.  
> Illusion: Okay.  
> Willow: Why does Illusion act so different between Chapter 5 and Chapter... the rest?  
> Illusion: Using my power takes up more than a bit of energy, and I had been up all night. I was tired. Also, I had made Voicey mad earlier.  
> Maxi: Who is the voice?  
> Illusion: Voicey.  
> *shrugs*  
> Maxi: Hey, Illusion, could ya head over there a minute? *points to door*  
> Illusion: Outside?  
> Maxi: Yeah.  
> Illusion: Okay! *leaves*  
> Willow: 'Voicey' is you, isn't it, Maxils?  
> Not necessarily.  
> Bob: Come on. 'Voicey' first appeared in the same chapter that Illusion first came here. That can't be a coincidence.  
> Maxi: Yeah. It only makes sense that YOU would be the voice in Illusion's head. You're his creator and the one who writes this story.  
> I'm gonna just leave it to the readers to decide who or what the voice is. You can headcanon it as me, or you can chalk it up to insanity.  
> Willow: So, when are you gonna get to work on those short stories?  
> Shut up, Cat.  
> DAMN WE'VE HIT 300 HITS (pun not intended until i realized it, now it's entirely intended)  
> Thanks for supporting the story, everyone! As a celebration, Chapter 12 will be a **_SUPER ULTRA MEGA CHAPTER OF AWESOME EPICNESS!!!_** (and will take a really long time)
> 
> Next chapter, a butcher searches for his stripper boyfriend! An artist attempts to prepare for his totally-not-date with a programmer! A graveyard manager and a cashier discuss the status of their relationship! A fast food worker notices that his therapist is acting off! An illusionist brings his Senpai to a super secret location!
> 
> DRAMA ACTION PROBABLE BLOODSHED!!!
> 
> Immediately after posting Chapter 10, this work's stats were as follows:  
> 50 comments, with exactly half of them being my own  
> 305 hits!  
> 21 kudos  
> 3 bookmarks  
> 7 subscriptions  
> 10 chapters (duh)  
> 19605 words


	11. in which Horror throws an axe in Edge's general direction, Ink can't decide on an outfit, Reaper and Geno officially become boyfriends, Classic makes a big brain pun and Illusion needs a hug

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In other news, I haven't updated for almost a week (sorry), Cooking with a Killer Robot’s new season starts next Tuesday, I break the fourth wall, and Illusion is a scared boi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mer crimmas erry1 and sorry for vanishing

**{Horror’s POV}**

Horror walked through the town, searching diligently for Lust.  _ What the hell have you gotten yourself into this time, you sexy bastard? _   
So far, there had been no sign of Lust whatsoever. Not by the bar, not by the fast food joint, not even by the god damn club… It truly seemed as though Lust had vanished into thin air, which he surely wouldn’t do… right?   
If he was lucky, Lust would be sleeping in one of the alleyways that Horror hadn’t looked into yet, but that was best case scenario. Worst case scenario, he was dead, though that was highly unlikely, thank god.   
_ I haven’t checked by the candy store yet… _ he notified himself, teleporting off.

~timeskip brought to you by me not updating for almost a week and a very merry cherryberry christmas to you~

No sign of Lust anywhere. The chocolate store had yielded no results. Maybe Lust had reappeared at one of the spots that Horror had already checked?   
“GET BACK HERE, YOU MOTHER FUCKING SLUT!!!” someone screeched from the distance. Horror took a moment to connect the dots.  _ Lust is missing… Slut is an anagram for Lust… Lust is, no offense, kind of a slut… My slut, of course... _   
When the last piece snapped into place, he muttered, “God damn it, Lust, what did you do this time…” to himself before teleporting to the general location of the sound.   
Sure enough, Edge was throwing numerous sharp-ended attacks at Lust. It was almost amusing, Horror had to admit, but he was going to save his boyfriend anyways.   
With one swift motion, the red-eyed skeleton blocked an attack that was headed straight for Lust with the former’s axe.   
“Horror-kun~!” Lust purred seductively (and also with one hell of a lot of fear). “Save me from the evil  _ Edge _ -y menace!”   
“YOU’RE ASKING FOR A DEATH SENTENCE, YOU PIECE OF SHIT!!!” Edge screamed, launching a flurry of attacks at Horror and Lust, which Horror spun around his axe to deflect.   
“What did you even do?!” Horror yelled between the attacks.   
“Called him boomer…” Lust answered meekly. “And possibly teased him about his crush on Blue…”   
Horror resisted facepalming as he noticed that Edge’s right hand was in bandages. “Get out of here for a couple of minutes. I have a plan.”   
Lust nodded as another flurry of attacks came. He teleported off, leaving just Horror and Edge to fight. The former threw his axe at full power, the weapon just barely missing Edge. It did manage to strike enough terror into Edge to make the attacks stop, though.   
“H-ha,” Edge panted, “you… you m-missed.”   
“Or did I?” Horror answered, teleporting over and squeezing Edge’s right hand as hard as he could.   
“OW SHIT MOTHER FUCK LET GO PLEASE OW MERCY!!!”   
At the mention of mercy, Horror loosened his grip. “Why should I, after you nearly fucking killed my boyfriend?”   
“I-I’ll never b-be able to cook b-burgers for you a-a-again if you don’t!” Edge answered, tears forming in his sockets.   
“Fine.” Horror let go and Edge immediately teleported off. The possibility of not having Edge be able to make delicious burgers ever again was just too great to risk.   
It was at that moment that Lust came back, his eyelights shifting back and forth in fear. “Is… is he gone yet?” Lust asked, both his voice and body shaking.   
“Don’t worry, my precious,” Horror nodded, bringing Lust in for a hug. “He’s gone.” Horror exhaled in disappointment. “You know, you did something  _ really _ fucking stupid.”   
“Y-yeah…” Lust whined.   
“On top of that, you vanished without telling me- hell, without telling  _ anyone _ where you went and had me worried sick.”  _ After I realized that you were gone, that is. _ “Also, you missed Shrek.”   
“I did?!” Lust looked up with a horrified look in his eyes. “Oh… and sorry…”   
“It’s fine.” Horror kissed Lust’s foreskull gently. “Just try not to do that again, okay?”   
“O-okay,” Lust agreed, returning the kiss. They stood still in a hug for about a minute before teleporting off.

**{Ink’s POV}**

Ink sorted through his good clothes (of which he had very few; he didn’t get out much). As much as he tried to ignore it, the way Error had acted while asking Ink if he wanted to go get some drinks had made it sound like a date, despite Error’s insistence that it wasn’t that, but Ink still didn’t want to  _ stain _ his reputation by wearing something tacky.   
“No, not this… not that, either…” Maybe Error didn’t care about what clothes Ink wore? What if Ink would be making a fool out of himself by dressing up in something fancy?   
“Something bordering between casual and fancy, maybe?” He didn’t have anything that fit that description. “God damn it…”   
Today was unfolding to be utter shit. First, he’d made Blue and Dream fucking hate him. Now, he was having a hard time deciding on whether or not to wear something casual or something formal.  _ Can’t wait for the not-date itself to come… _   
He decided to distract himself by watching TV. He turned the device on and switched the channel to the news.   
“...In other news, Cooking with a Killer Robot’s new season starts next Tuesday, and sources say that it’s going to be the biggest season yet!” the first news announcer reported.   
“Indeed, it seems that way,” the other responded. “The show’s host, Mettaton, has informed everyone that he’s going to be a guest star tomorrow night on All-Nighter Hour with-”   
Ink switched the channel to see that Spongebob Squarepants was just starting.   
“Spongebob Squarepants! Spongebob Squarepants! Spongebob Squarepants! Spongebob Squarepaaaaaaants!” the intro played. Ink hummed along to the fife melody just before the commercial came on.   
While the commercials played, Ink continued sorting through the clothes to find something suitable to wear, humming the portion of the theme song that he had missed while doing so.  _ Maybe tonight won’t be so bad. _

**{Reaper’s POV}**

Neither Reaper nor Geno knew how long they remained kissing for. Out in public. Where everyone could see them. Miraculously (and for plot purposes), neither of them registered that fact, and neither would until much later on.   
Eventually, much to Reaper’s dismay, the kiss ended. “Why’d you stop?” he whined to Geno.   
“Because we need to talk about what this means about our relationship status.”   
“Can’t we have sex first?~”   
“No.”   
Reaper pouted, but Geno didn’t seem fazed by it. After that finally sunk in, he rolled his eyelights. “Tell me again, why weren’t we dating before?”   
Geno made a noise that made it seem like he was going to say something, but the noise ended as quickly as it came.   
“I’ll tell you why,” Reaper answered. “It’s because neither of us had the  _ guts _ to do anything.”   
Geno snorted audibly. “Oh, come on. You offered sex about fifty… billion times.”   
“Okay, I was waiting for you to make a move, you nitpicking bastard.”   
“Aren’t I  _ your _ nitpicking bastard now?~” Geno… he was probably trying to wink, but having one (visible) eye made doing so impossible, so he ended up looking like he was blinking instead.   
Reaper was honestly surprised. He had never expected to make it this far in a relationship. Fortunately, there was something that set Geno apart from almost everyone else, something that actually let Reaper try to get into a relationship with him.   
“I’ll take the blush all over your face as a yes~” Geno eventually said, kissing Reaper again.   
“How the hell did I succeed in any form of romantic advances with you?” he chuckled.   
“By being the only person I actually trust enough to spill all of my life’s problems to,” Geno confirmed, holding Reaper close. “And by being hot as shit.”   
“Hotter than a jalapeño pepper, baby~” he winked. “Then again, so are you~”   
They resumed kissing for a long time after the flirting was over.

**{Classic’s POV}**

“So, how has your week been?” Dream asked Sans.   
“Pretty okay. The restaurant was pretty busy earlier, not to mention that Edge almost fucking killed someone, forcing me to delay the opening of the restaurant because he made such a mess. Thank god I didn’t find any dust,” he sighed. “Everything else was fine until Edge burnt his hand. He claims to be coming back to work in a couple more days.”   
“Who’d he get into a fight with this time?” Dream replied, facepalming.   
“Some guy named Lust.”   
“And how did Edge burn his hand?”   
“Thinkin’ about your friend, Blue.”   
Dream’s head seemed to perk up as though he knew something. Sans had a pretty good idea of what.   
“Blue likes him back, doesn’t he?” Sans grinned.    
“What makes you think that?” Dream replied with an impressive poker face that his voice did not betray.   
“Let’s see… there’s the fact that Lust responded that Blue probably would after Edge said, ‘Oh, fuck me,’ and that they started making out after, like, six drinks, and that Edge teleported himself and Blue to Blue’s place.” Sans paused for a moment. “Don’t tell Edge that I told you this.”   
“Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me,” Dream replied.   
“Also, aren’t these meetings supposed to be about me?”   
“Oh, yeah. Right. Anyways, what else has happened this week?”   
“I rickrolled everyone.”   
“Using the trombone?”   
“The same one that got you and Cross to kiss.”    
Dream immediately turned bright yellow. “M-moving on now.”   
“No, tell me more. Did you take Ink’s advice?” Sans pressed. “If so, did he accept?”   
“These meetings are about you, rememer?” Dream glared. Sans knew that he had won this battle, so he decided to move on.   
“Okay, fine, I’ll drop it.”  _ You confirmed both of those questions for me, though. _   
“Thank you. Anyways, you have been doing the motivational quotes to yourself in the mirror, right?”   
_ FUCK. _ Sans had completely forgotten about that, especially with what had been going on over the past few days. “Y-yes, of course.”   
“Of course you haven’t.”   
“It’s been an eventful week, okay?”   
“Sans, I’ve been telling you to do that for the past  _ month. _ Clearly, that technique isn’t going to work.” Dream flipped through his notes. “What am I going to do with you…?”   
“ _ Tibia _ honest, I could just sit here and make puns all day, but I don’t think that would improve my puntastic  _ skulls _ much. My  _ rib ticklers _ are already un _ parietal _ elled.”   
“Sans, now is not the time for jokes. How many times do I have to tell you that-”   
“I know, laughter is  _ not  _ the best medicine when it comes to me, it’s just a temporary shield from the depression.” Sans rolled his eyelights. “But it’s not like I can take a week off from work right now-”   
“That’s a great idea,” Dream stopped him. “When Edge comes back, you can take a break from work. It doesn’t have to be a week, just a couple of days. During that time, you can do what you want without any of the stress of work stopping you.”   
“But-”   
“No buts, Sans.”   
_ Okay, maybe the ‘but’ I had in mind wasn’t the best one to say in front of Dream. _ “Fine. I’ll take the break.”   
“And no crying yourself to sleep.”   
“You think I do that?” Sans was actually slightly offended by the remark, even though he knew it was just a joke.   
“Fine, no crying myself to sleep, or binging Netflix and ice cream, or drinking ketchup exclusively.” That was when he realized that Dream had been seeming more on edge than normal today. “You seem kind of upset, Dream. Do you need my trombone’s melodious melodies to soothe your mood?”   
“NO.”   
“It’s about yesterday, isn’t it?”   
“N-no…” Dream turned away. That meant yes.   
“Dude, it’s fine if ya don’t wanna talk about it, but you’re gonna have to do better than that to hide whatever’s bothering you from me.”   
“Nightmare’s return is something I never expected to happen,” Dream began. This was gonna be a  _ long _ session.

**{Illusion’s POV}**

Illusion carried Fresh’s unconscious body towards one of the cells that Nightmare had designed. The cells were made to prevent magic from being used inside of them (Illusion didn’t know how that was supposed to work), because pretty much everyone in the town had the ability to teleport.  
Illusion walked past the other hostages, flinching at each one.   
“Let me out! LET ME OUT!!!” one screamed.   
“You think you can keep me in here, huh? Do ya? DO YA?!” screeched another, shaking the cell door violently. Illusion jumped back, startled.   
The third one gave a lonely glance towards Illusion. He considered going in to say hi, until the prisoner smiled creepily, sending a chill down Ilusion’s spine.   
“I don’t have the literal OR metaphorical guts for this place…” he shuddered.   
_ You’re fine. You managed to capture Fresh alone. You can fight them off if they escape, which they won’t. _   
“Th-thanks, Voicey.” He continued on with Fresh until he reached the nearest empty cell. He placed the limp body onto the ground and went back for a chair. After exiting the cell-filled area, he teleported upstairs to grab a chair and ropes because Nightmare had told him to do so. He went back down, ignoring the other hostages, and placed the chair in the middle of Fresh’s cell. He went to pick up Fresh again and put him into the chair.   
“Chair, check. What’s next on the list?”   
_ Binding his arms and legs to the chair with the rope.. After that, blindfold and gag him. _   
“All the other prisoners could have used gags…” Illusion muttered under his breath. Unfortunately, he was not quiet enough, as the other prisoners started throwing hissy fits. Illusion quickly tied Fresh to the chair and ran upstairs as fast as he could, completely forgetting about the part where he needed to blindfold and gag Fresh.   
“NIGHTMARE!!!” he cried out, hoping that Nightmare would answer.   
“WHAT?!” the tentacled skeleton growled in response from a different room.   
“Why do the other prisoners not have gags?!”   
“Because they don’t speak in the annoying 90’s slang that Fresh does.”   
“MOTHER FUCK, I KNEW I FORGOT SOMETHING!” Illusion facepalmed. He went to find the blindfold and gag that Nightmare had told him to find earlier. “Why can’t I just have a normal life…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Willow: Yay, you finally took that break! now plz put me down  
> Yeah. Woohoo. NO.  
> Bob: So, next chapter ain't coming until New Year's?  
> Pretty much.  
> Maxi: So when will Illusion go visit Fresh?  
> As soon as the next chapter starts.  
> Illusion: It's fine... they're in the story... you're outside of it...  
> Someone's gonna have nightmares for weeks.  
> Illusion: OF COURSE I AM, THANKS TO YOU!!!  
> Okay, calm the fuck down. Next chapter, you get to do shit with Fresh, okay?  
> Illusion: *nods slowly* But why'd you break the fourth wall?  
> Plot.  
> Illusion: Oh ok  
> Maxi: YOU'RE JUST FUCKING OKAY WITH THAT?  
> Everyone Else: *nods*  
> Maxi: Maxils, why?!  
> SHUT UP, MAXI! YOU DON'T LOVE ME, ANYWAYS!!!  
> Willow: So, when are Blue and Edge gonna fuck?  
> Shut up, Cat. You know that there's not gonna be sex.  
> Willow: Fine, now PUT ME THE FUCK DOWN!  
> Nuuuu imma hug u  
> Bob: Maxils is sorry, blah blah blah, shit will hit the fan next chapter.  
> (a few weeks later)  
> damn this next chapter is taking a while  
> Willow: No shit.
> 
> Next chapter, shit will REALLY hit the fan when a dank memer wakes up kidnapped! A programmer waits for his date to arrive! A writer and a therapist begin their date! A fast food worker goes to see a 'good' Christian 'pureboi' (again)! A criminal mastermind plots out his next plan of attack! A 'good' Christian 'pureboi' learns the truth about his tacos! A therapist hears a poem from his date! An illusionist has some fun with his prisoner! A police officer learns about the new missing person! An artist fucks up for the billionth time in a day! See? MEGA chapter!  
> Willow: You said there would be no-  
> I never said no torture/mild rape/non-con!
> 
> Merry Christmas, or whatever holiday you all celebrate, and I will see you in the new year!
> 
> DRAMA! ACTION! BLOODSHED!  
> Bob: OH SHIT the probable got removed!  
> It's only temporary because Mettaton got a mention this chapter. I never said that the town was the only town that existed.


End file.
